WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 good evening hi everyone 00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:04.000 first I'd like to start off 00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:05.000 by welcoming everyone to 00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.000 MSU's annual Out and Proud 00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 event my name is Paulina Gutierrez 00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:11.000 I'm a coordinator 00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:12.000 for the Multicultural Student Union 00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:13.000 as well as one of 00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:15.000 the co presidents and this 00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.000 is Makana she's the other 00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:18.000 co president and we'll be 00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:25.000 hosting tonight's dinner 00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 I hope everyone has gotten -- 00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.000 dinner if you haven't please 00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 help yourself -- I'd like to 00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 share a little bit about why 00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 Out and Proud was created we want 00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 to celebrate and explore the 00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:39.000 various cultures and ethnic 00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:43.000 backgrounds within the LGBTQA+ 00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:45.000 community and this 00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 challenges people of color face 00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:51.000 within the community as well 00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.000 as celebrate their achievements 00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:57.000 and successes tonight we have 00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 a -- a wonderful human being 00:00:59.000 --> 00:00:61.000 named Mick Rose who is 00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:02.000 here to share some of their 00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 challenges and achievements 00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:07.000 as a queer person of color 00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 in this community Mick Rose 00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 is an indigiqueer 00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 nonbinary human from the 00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 Din' Omaha Pawnee nations Mick is a 00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 grassroots organizer educator 00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.000 foster parent an advocate 00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.000 who is deeply committed to 00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 the sovereignty of indigenous 00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:29.000 and queer people around the 00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.000 world Mick founded team 00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:34.000 indigenous roller derby 00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 in 2017 the 00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:39.000 first World Cup team entirely 00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:42.000 devoted to promoting borderless 00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:44.000 indigenous nations in any sport 00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 sporting event Mick traveled the 00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.000 world from 2012 00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:51.000 to 2018 living 00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:55.000 part time in France England 00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:57.000 New Zealand and in New Zealand 00:01:59.000 --> 00:01:62.000 and -- the roller derby team 00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:04.000 and grass roots organizing 00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.000 with indigenous nations -- 00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:11.000 locally and the -- diaspora 00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:15.000 in Portland on Chinook Nations 00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:16.000 territory working in the 00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 field of violence prevention 00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:20.000 for two-spirit and indigiqueer youth 00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 as well as -- 00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:26.000 infusing indigenous culture 00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.000 wellness and education in the 00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:29.000 public school system through 00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:31.000 their work with the Senate 00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:33.000 Bill 13 tribal history 00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:35.000 shared history and managing 00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.000 an after school program at 00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:39.000 the Native American Youth and 00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.000 Family Center please join me 00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:43.000 in welcoming Mick to the stage 00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:50.000 applause 00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.000 good evening everybody -- I 00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:54.000 would like to start out and 00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:55.000 acknowledge that tonight we're 00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:57.000 on stolen and unseeded 00:02:57.000 --> 00:02:59.000 lands of the Kalapuya and 00:02:59.000 --> 00:02:61.000 Luckiamute tribes both of which are 00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:03.000 now members of the Confederated 00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:04.000 Tribes of Grand Ronde as a 00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:06.000 result of the Session 352 00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:09.000 treaty in which -- 00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:11.000 in 1846 Great Britain 00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:12.000 gave United States 00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:14.000 full claim to the lower Oregon 00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:17.000 territory the reason for the 00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:18.000 removal of the Kalapuya and 00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:20.000 Luckiamute nations from 00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:21.000 their traditional lands is of 00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.000 course because of the abundance 00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:25.000 of productive agricultural land 00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:27.000 at least twenty tribes were 00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:28.000 violently removed from their 00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:30.000 lands and given small parcels 00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:32.000 of land in an act of Congress 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:33.000 called the Oregon Donation 00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:36.000 Land Act in -- 1855 00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:37.000 at the behest of 00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:39.000 the United States government 00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:41.000 the tribes became confederated 00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:42.000 in order to protect them from 00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:44.000 white settlers who had become 00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:46.000 increasingly violent these 00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:47.000 tribes settled in the 00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:49.000 Grand Ronde Valley and became the 00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:51.000 of the Grande Ronde where 00:03:51.000 --> 00:03:52.000 they lived for one hundred 00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:54.000 years in 1954 00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:57.000 the Congress terminated 00:03:57.000 --> 00:03:59.000 their tribal sovereignty and 00:03:59.000 --> 00:03:62.000 all treaties this act took 00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:04.000 their power away it took 00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:06.000 them thirty years to persuade 00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:08.000 persuade Congress to restore 00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:09.000 their sovereignty and gain 00:04:09.000 --> 00:04:11.000 back their treaty rights 00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:13.000 this university as stated by 00:04:13.000 --> 00:04:15.000 your website reads WOU 00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:16.000 is a public university in 00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:18.000 the Monmouth region it was 00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:19.000 originally established in 00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:23.000 pioneers as Monmouth University 00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:25.000 that's just one year after 00:04:25.000 --> 00:04:26.000 those tribes were removed from 00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:29.000 this land I tell you the full 00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:30.000 history of the land we're on 00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:32.000 tonight because this story 00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:34.000 is similar to my tribe story 00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:35.000 to every indigenous persons 00:04:35.000 --> 00:04:37.000 ancestral and family history 00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:39.000 you'll meet and a core trauma 00:04:39.000 --> 00:04:40.000 that influences who we are 00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:43.000 as individuals I also tell 00:04:43.000 --> 00:04:44.000 you this full history because 00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:46.000 the removal of this tribe 00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:47.000 of these tribes is why you're 00:04:47.000 --> 00:04:48.000 privileged to -- attended 00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:52.000 this university let us never 00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:53.000 forget our privilege on the 00:04:53.000 --> 00:04:55.000 land we occupy and -- in the 00:04:55.000 --> 00:04:62.000 institutions that we study 00:05:16.000 --> 00:05:19.000 hello everybody my name is Mick Rose 00:05:19.000 --> 00:05:22.000 I'm from the Many Hogans Clan 00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:24.000 born for the Mexican People Clan 00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:26.000 my paternal grandfather 00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:29.000 is from the White Buffalo Clan 00:05:29.000 --> 00:05:31.000 of the Omaha nation and 00:05:31.000 --> 00:05:33.000 my paternal grandfather is 00:05:33.000 --> 00:05:36.000 an Irish and German settler 00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:37.000 I was raised on my ancestral 00:05:37.000 --> 00:05:39.000 homelands in the Din' nation 00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:42.000 it's in the southwest desert 00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:46.000 what indigenous people call 00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:49.000 the United States our land's 00:05:49.000 --> 00:05:50.000 Northern Territory begins in 00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:51.000 the canyon lands of Utah all 00:05:51.000 --> 00:05:52.000 the way down to the Painted 00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:55.000 Deserts of Arizona we stretch 00:05:55.000 --> 00:05:57.000 west from the Grand Canyon 00:05:57.000 --> 00:05:58.000 all the way over to the Rocky 00:05:58.000 --> 00:05:60.000 Mountains and we're surrounded 00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:02.000 by four sacred mountains parts 00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:04.000 of my home lands are also shared 00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:06.000 by other tribal communities 00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:07.000 are cousins are the 00:06:07.000 --> 00:06:09.000 Apache Nations in the mountains of 00:06:09.000 --> 00:06:11.000 Arizona also the Ute Nations 00:06:11.000 --> 00:06:13.000 in the mountains of the Rockies 00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:16.000 Table Top Mesas kind of 00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:17.000 in the middle and the 00:06:17.000 --> 00:06:20.000 Tewa Nations which we overlap with 00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:22.000 I'm honored to be here tonight 00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:24.000 special thanks to Paulina -- 00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:25.000 for asking me to be the keynote 00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:27.000 this evening it took a lot of 00:06:27.000 --> 00:06:29.000 time really thinking about and 00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:32.000 digesting what to speak about 00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:35.000 and Proud and it's something 00:06:35.000 --> 00:06:36.000 I've heard a lot in my life 00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:38.000 as a queer person -- but I 00:06:38.000 --> 00:06:40.000 haven't really thought of it 00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:43.000 as relating to myself I haven't 00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:44.000 always identified with the 00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:47.000 queer community -- and at many 00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:48.000 times I felt marginalized by 00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:50.000 the queer community when trying 00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:52.000 to participate in activities I 00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:53.000 felt as if they weren't really 00:06:53.000 --> 00:06:55.000 for me not long ago when I 00:06:55.000 --> 00:06:57.000 was in university there was 00:06:57.000 --> 00:06:59.000 either gay or lesbian -- the 00:06:59.000 --> 00:06:60.000 only trans folks I knew of 00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:02.000 were assigned male at birth and 00:07:02.000 --> 00:07:03.000 given no support with hormone 00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:05.000 replacement therapy or gender 00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:07.000 affirming surgeries I didn't 00:07:07.000 --> 00:07:09.000 fall into those categories 00:07:09.000 --> 00:07:10.000 and I certainly didn't feel 00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:12.000 hetero so at that time there 00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:13.000 wasn't really a language in the 00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:16.000 mainstream society to really 00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:19.000 find what my identity was I come 00:07:19.000 --> 00:07:20.000 from an indigenous nation we 00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:22.000 have a concept of five genders 00:07:22.000 --> 00:07:23.000 we have 00:07:27.000 --> 00:07:28.000 and we also have a non gendered 00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:29.000 word that we've 00:07:29.000 --> 00:07:32.000 lost to due to colonization 00:07:32.000 --> 00:07:35.000 hastiin means male 00:07:38.000 --> 00:07:40.000 which is somebody that 00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:41.000 identifies with the female 00:07:41.000 --> 00:07:44.000 spirit and we have -- and 00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:45.000 that's somebody that identifies 00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:47.000 with the male spirit and then 00:07:47.000 --> 00:07:49.000 we have that non gendered 00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:54.000 my family is a mix of people 00:07:54.000 --> 00:07:56.000 that come from a very strong 00:07:56.000 --> 00:07:57.000 Christian background we have 00:07:57.000 --> 00:07:59.000 people that are non Christian 00:07:59.000 --> 00:07:60.000 we have people that are kind of 00:08:00.000 --> 00:08:02.000 anti Christian we have younger 00:08:02.000 --> 00:08:04.000 generations trying to really 00:08:04.000 --> 00:08:07.000 reconnect with -- our heritage 00:08:07.000 --> 00:08:09.000 our language or culture and 00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:11.000 all of my elders speak read 00:08:11.000 --> 00:08:15.000 and write our language they -- 00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:18.000 don't share those language -- 00:08:18.000 --> 00:08:19.000 they didn't share that language 00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:21.000 with us and that's something 00:08:21.000 --> 00:08:22.000 that I'll kind of go into a little 00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:24.000 bit deeper and it's something 00:08:24.000 --> 00:08:25.000 that we've all reclaimed I 00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:27.000 took university studies in 00:08:27.000 --> 00:08:30.000 order to learn my language -- 00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:32.000 so really thinking about Out 00:08:32.000 --> 00:08:34.000 and Proud I think my concept 00:08:34.000 --> 00:08:35.000 of embodying that is that at 00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:38.000 a few different intersections 00:08:38.000 --> 00:08:39.000 it's at an intersection of 00:08:39.000 --> 00:08:40.000 being proud to be Din' to 00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:42.000 be Omaha and to be Pawnee 00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:44.000 something that was shameful as 00:08:44.000 --> 00:08:46.000 I was growing up it's at the 00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:48.000 intersection of reclaiming my 00:08:48.000 --> 00:08:49.000 identity as a person assigned 00:08:49.000 --> 00:08:51.000 female at birth who identifies 00:08:51.000 --> 00:08:53.000 as non binary it's at the 00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:55.000 intersection of discovering 00:08:55.000 --> 00:08:57.000 my queer identity it's at the 00:08:57.000 --> 00:08:59.000 intersection of being femme 00:08:59.000 --> 00:08:62.000 high femme as my partner calls me 00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:03.000 it's learning what the language 00:09:03.000 --> 00:09:05.000 of identity even is within 00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:06.000 the context of a resurgence 00:09:06.000 --> 00:09:08.000 and reclamation of indigenous 00:09:08.000 --> 00:09:11.000 tradition and culture I am a 00:09:11.000 --> 00:09:14.000 two-spirit indigiqueer non-binary 00:09:14.000 --> 00:09:16.000 Din' Omaha and Pawnee five 00:09:16.000 --> 00:09:18.000 fingered being in my culture 00:09:18.000 --> 00:09:20.000 we call humans five fingered 00:09:20.000 --> 00:09:21.000 beings because it puts us on 00:09:21.000 --> 00:09:23.000 the same level as all beings 00:09:23.000 --> 00:09:25.000 we're not above below but the 00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:27.000 same as all living beings on 00:09:27.000 --> 00:09:30.000 this world I grew up in a small 00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:32.000 town had one stoplight probably 00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:34.000 pretty similar to this one 00:09:36.000 --> 00:09:38.000 town although it was within the 00:09:38.000 --> 00:09:41.000 United States border because 00:09:41.000 --> 00:09:42.000 I lived on the reservation 00:09:42.000 --> 00:09:43.000 but everybody went to school 00:09:43.000 --> 00:09:45.000 and work off the reservation 00:09:45.000 --> 00:09:46.000 so there was a lot of tension 00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:50.000 around what a border town is -- 00:09:50.000 --> 00:09:51.000 I grew up on the Navajo Nation 00:09:51.000 --> 00:09:53.000 or what we call Din' Bi Keyah 00:09:53.000 --> 00:09:55.000 I went to school off the 00:09:55.000 --> 00:09:58.000 reservation as I said -- on 00:09:58.000 --> 00:09:59.000 a town built on the stolen 00:09:59.000 --> 00:09:62.000 territories of my nation I was 00:10:02.000 --> 00:10:04.000 pretty studious I loved to read 00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:06.000 I loved reading and back in 00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:07.000 the eighties and nineties sorry 00:10:08.000 --> 00:10:10.000 this is but I loved reading 00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:14.000 encyclopedias -- geography 00:10:14.000 --> 00:10:16.000 travel books any sort of atlas 00:10:16.000 --> 00:10:18.000 I could just map around the 00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:19.000 world and figure out you know 00:10:19.000 --> 00:10:21.000 where I was in relation to 00:10:21.000 --> 00:10:23.000 other things was fascinating 00:10:25.000 --> 00:10:26.000 those topics alone kind of 00:10:26.000 --> 00:10:27.000 tell you a lot about me as 00:10:27.000 --> 00:10:30.000 a kid I was a curious nerd 00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:32.000 and I wanted to escape as I 00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:34.000 imagined most young kids do and 00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:35.000 especially the queer ones in 00:10:35.000 --> 00:10:38.000 small towns I went to 00:10:38.000 --> 00:10:39.000 Brigham Young University on a full 00:10:39.000 --> 00:10:42.000 ride academic scholarship to 00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:44.000 go from a rural small town of 00:10:44.000 --> 00:10:45.000 six thousand kind of spread 00:10:45.000 --> 00:10:47.000 out community similar to this 00:10:47.000 --> 00:10:49.000 one in northern New Mexico to 00:10:49.000 --> 00:10:51.000 a university who's student body was 00:10:51.000 --> 00:10:54.000 five times my town's population 00:10:54.000 --> 00:10:56.000 was quite the adjustment I 00:10:56.000 --> 00:10:57.000 don't know how many of you know 00:10:57.000 --> 00:10:59.000 about BYU so I'll give you 00:10:59.000 --> 00:10:61.000 a little context it's a Mormon 00:11:01.000 --> 00:11:04.000 private university it's very 00:11:04.000 --> 00:11:06.000 strict very Christian based 00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:08.000 there's an honor code that 00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:10.000 students must adhere to such as 00:11:10.000 --> 00:11:12.000 eighty five percent attendance 00:11:12.000 --> 00:11:14.000 to all church activities that 00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:16.000 includes five hours on Sundays 00:11:16.000 --> 00:11:17.000 two hours on Mondays three 00:11:17.000 --> 00:11:19.000 hours on Wednesday and then 00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:20.000 you have to do a social event 00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:23.000 on the weekend -- it's quite a 00:11:23.000 --> 00:11:25.000 distraction from your studies 00:11:25.000 --> 00:11:26.000 which means you have no time 00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:29.000 other than church and studying 00:11:30.000 --> 00:11:33.000 date -- you have to be chased 00:11:33.000 --> 00:11:35.000 there's no making out hand 00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:37.000 holding is a little bit iffy 00:11:37.000 --> 00:11:39.000 and there's definitely no sex 00:11:39.000 --> 00:11:41.000 before marriage and above all 00:11:41.000 --> 00:11:44.000 no homosexuality I discovered 00:11:44.000 --> 00:11:46.000 while I was a student there 00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:48.000 research like I said I was a 00:11:48.000 --> 00:11:49.000 nerd I was constantly at 00:11:49.000 --> 00:11:52.000 the library I would go into -- 00:11:52.000 --> 00:11:54.000 the research stacks and just 00:11:54.000 --> 00:11:57.000 to learn because I was bored 00:12:01.000 --> 00:12:04.000 I found some information on 00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:06.000 the psych department and at 00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:07.000 that time they were conducting 00:12:07.000 --> 00:12:09.000 conversion therapy using 00:12:09.000 --> 00:12:14.000 electric shock -- it's a it's 00:12:14.000 --> 00:12:16.000 a pretty scary modality -- 00:12:16.000 --> 00:12:18.000 and this was specifically for 00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:20.000 the homosexual students on 00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:22.000 campus so to be queer in this 00:12:22.000 --> 00:12:24.000 setting would mean that you 00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:25.000 had to choose between being 00:12:25.000 --> 00:12:27.000 expelled from university being 00:12:27.000 --> 00:12:29.000 excommunicated from your church 00:12:29.000 --> 00:12:31.000 and your community or face 00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:33.000 electric shock therapy and try 00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:36.000 to be straight I knew then it 00:12:36.000 --> 00:12:38.000 was a dangerous place to be and 00:12:38.000 --> 00:12:39.000 that I needed to fit in I needed 00:12:39.000 --> 00:12:41.000 to be what they wanted in order 00:12:41.000 --> 00:12:43.000 to keep my scholarship and get 00:12:43.000 --> 00:12:45.000 that degree so I could get out I 00:12:45.000 --> 00:12:47.000 had big dreams but I was very 00:12:47.000 --> 00:12:49.000 limited by my circumstances I 00:12:49.000 --> 00:12:51.000 struggled I didn't feel like I 00:12:51.000 --> 00:12:54.000 fit in in any way I looked like 00:12:54.000 --> 00:12:59.000 I fit in but I didn't feel it 00:12:59.000 --> 00:12:60.000 I studied beyond the course 00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:02.000 work that was assigned I was 00:13:02.000 --> 00:13:04.000 very interested in history 00:13:04.000 --> 00:13:06.000 and what was then called 00:13:06.000 --> 00:13:08.000 Native American studies most 00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:09.000 of the time I studied further 00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:10.000 and deeper than any of my 00:13:10.000 --> 00:13:12.000 professors many of the times in 00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:13.000 my classes I would experience 00:13:13.000 --> 00:13:15.000 micro aggressions from them 00:13:15.000 --> 00:13:17.000 from my fellow students as well 00:13:17.000 --> 00:13:19.000 I would typically be the only 00:13:19.000 --> 00:13:21.000 person of color as viewed by 00:13:21.000 --> 00:13:23.000 those professors and students 00:13:23.000 --> 00:13:25.000 who were typically white -- 00:13:25.000 --> 00:13:26.000 black and brown folks kind of 00:13:26.000 --> 00:13:28.000 melted into one homogeneous 00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:30.000 culture one language one 00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:31.000 tradition it was kind of 00:13:31.000 --> 00:13:33.000 all the same to them -- in 00:13:33.000 --> 00:13:36.000 that specific community only 00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:37.000 when I had to counter their 00:13:37.000 --> 00:13:39.000 micro aggressions and racist 00:13:39.000 --> 00:13:40.000 assumptions about indigenous 00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:42.000 history did they discover that 00:13:42.000 --> 00:13:44.000 I knew what I was talking about 00:13:44.000 --> 00:13:46.000 even then even when I would 00:13:46.000 --> 00:13:48.000 try to convey a full context of 00:13:48.000 --> 00:13:50.000 the subject using my resources 00:13:50.000 --> 00:13:52.000 stating primary resources 00:13:52.000 --> 00:13:54.000 showing them the documents I 00:13:54.000 --> 00:13:56.000 was told I was too contentious 00:13:56.000 --> 00:13:58.000 too passionate too close to the 00:13:58.000 --> 00:13:59.000 subject matter I was asked to 00:13:59.000 --> 00:13:63.000 sit down and a kind of Mormon 00:14:03.000 --> 00:14:07.000 phrase is to be meek and mild not 00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:08.000 only was I marginalized in the 00:14:08.000 --> 00:14:10.000 classroom but I had a spotlight 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:11.000 on my behavior in my personal 00:14:11.000 --> 00:14:14.000 life as I said BYU had 00:14:14.000 --> 00:14:15.000 a code of conduct it was called 00:14:15.000 --> 00:14:18.000 the code of honor and all were 00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:19.000 admonished to live a certain 00:14:19.000 --> 00:14:21.000 ethic if you saw someone who 00:14:21.000 --> 00:14:23.000 was not living this fully you 00:14:23.000 --> 00:14:24.000 were encouraged to turn them 00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:27.000 in -- to your religious leader or 00:14:27.000 --> 00:14:29.000 to the code of conduct office 00:14:29.000 --> 00:14:31.000 they had a full office -- as you 00:14:31.000 --> 00:14:33.000 can imagine I was turned in by 00:14:33.000 --> 00:14:36.000 other students many times for 00:14:36.000 --> 00:14:37.000 you know owning R-rated 00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:39.000 movies owning CDs with 00:14:39.000 --> 00:14:42.000 explicit content for having 00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:43.000 boys in my house after ten 00:14:43.000 --> 00:14:44.000 for letting those boys use the 00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:47.000 restroom -- for wearing shorts 00:14:47.000 --> 00:14:50.000 and tank tops when I exercised 00:14:50.000 --> 00:14:52.000 for going home to ceremony 00:14:52.000 --> 00:14:53.000 because indigenous practices 00:14:53.000 --> 00:14:56.000 were not allowed and an event 00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:58.000 that haunts me to this 00:14:58.000 --> 00:14:60.000 day is a time that I nearly 00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:01.000 got arrested and kicked out 00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:02.000 of school for taking a bite 00:15:02.000 --> 00:15:04.000 of my pizza as I stood in the 00:15:04.000 --> 00:15:05.000 university cafeteria line to 00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:09.000 pay for it as I stood in a long 00:15:09.000 --> 00:15:12.000 line with my best friend -- I 00:15:12.000 --> 00:15:14.000 similar to I think Paulina 00:15:14.000 --> 00:15:16.000 I was the vice president of our 00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:17.000 Native Student Club she was a 00:15:17.000 --> 00:15:19.000 secretary we were chatting away 00:15:19.000 --> 00:15:20.000 about this Pow Wow that we were 00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:22.000 planning super excited the line 00:15:22.000 --> 00:15:24.000 was super long and you know 00:15:24.000 --> 00:15:26.000 what my pizza was getting cold 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:28.000 so I took some bites as I was 00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:29.000 waiting in line I had other 00:15:29.000 --> 00:15:31.000 things with me all of a sudden 00:15:31.000 --> 00:15:33.000 I felt somebody tug on my elbow 00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:34.000 and I nearly dropped my pizza 00:15:34.000 --> 00:15:36.000 and kind of looked around like 00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:37.000 what's going on like maybe 00:15:37.000 --> 00:15:38.000 someone bumped into me what's 00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:42.000 happening -- it was a student and 00:15:42.000 --> 00:15:45.000 with me immediately and we both 00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:46.000 kind of looked at each other 00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:49.000 perplexed really unsure of 00:15:49.000 --> 00:15:51.000 what was going on I said well 00:15:51.000 --> 00:15:53.000 we're in line to purchase our 00:15:53.000 --> 00:15:55.000 lunch like can we talk after 00:15:55.000 --> 00:15:56.000 I don't even know who you 00:15:56.000 --> 00:15:59.000 are -- she said no the food 00:15:59.000 --> 00:15:60.000 manager needed to speak with 00:16:00.000 --> 00:16:02.000 us immediately we took our food 00:16:02.000 --> 00:16:04.000 with us we followed her out 00:16:04.000 --> 00:16:06.000 of the cafeteria up a side 00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:09.000 stairwell and into a long hallway of 00:16:09.000 --> 00:16:11.000 depressing windowless offices 00:16:11.000 --> 00:16:13.000 she asked me to sit in this 00:16:13.000 --> 00:16:15.000 office as I sat down I turned 00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:16.000 around and she led my friend 00:16:16.000 --> 00:16:21.000 away I felt ill I sat for 00:16:21.000 --> 00:16:23.000 thirty minutes in that office 00:16:23.000 --> 00:16:26.000 finally a middle aged bald guy 00:16:26.000 --> 00:16:28.000 he walked in and stood over me 00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:30.000 his first sentence was did you 00:16:30.000 --> 00:16:31.000 really think you'd get away 00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:33.000 from stealing from the Lord's 00:16:33.000 --> 00:16:36.000 university with that sentence 00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:37.000 I knew he'd already condemned 00:16:37.000 --> 00:16:39.000 me I tried to explain that 00:16:39.000 --> 00:16:40.000 I was in line to pay for my 00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:41.000 food that I was talking to my 00:16:41.000 --> 00:16:44.000 friend that I I even showed 00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:45.000 him my food card was like I'm 00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:47.000 about to pay for this -- I 00:16:47.000 --> 00:16:50.000 pleaded I used reason anything 00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:52.000 I could he sat there smugly 00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:54.000 with his arms folded and he 00:16:54.000 --> 00:16:55.000 said the police are on their 00:16:55.000 --> 00:16:58.000 way I had no idea what to do 00:16:58.000 --> 00:16:60.000 I was I mean it was before 00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:01.000 cell phones so I can't even 00:17:01.000 --> 00:17:04.000 text anybody couldn't call my mom 00:17:04.000 --> 00:17:06.000 and I definitely wasn't gonna 00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:08.000 let that man see me cry so I 00:17:08.000 --> 00:17:12.000 sat there sucking up my tears 00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:15.000 and holding my head up about 00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:17.000 an hour I sat there when the 00:17:17.000 --> 00:17:20.000 police arrived the man stood 00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:21.000 up and he said put her in 00:17:21.000 --> 00:17:24.000 handcuffs get her off this campus 00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:26.000 and the police officer put his 00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:28.000 head down and said I'm not 00:17:28.000 --> 00:17:29.000 going to do that but I will 00:17:29.000 --> 00:17:31.000 escort her off campus come 00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:34.000 with me that man was so angry 00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:35.000 that the police wouldn't arrest 00:17:35.000 --> 00:17:37.000 me like with handcuffs and lead 00:17:37.000 --> 00:17:39.000 me out in shame across campus 00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:41.000 for a dollar fifty pizza I've 00:17:41.000 --> 00:17:43.000 never seen someone so furious 00:17:43.000 --> 00:17:49.000 honestly not even my mom 00:17:49.000 --> 00:17:51.000 when outside the police officer 00:17:51.000 --> 00:17:54.000 looked at both of us and I 00:17:54.000 --> 00:17:55.000 thought we were going to get 00:17:55.000 --> 00:17:57.000 like a lecture or he was going 00:17:57.000 --> 00:17:58.000 to give us a ticket or arrest 00:17:58.000 --> 00:17:60.000 us or something like I had no 00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:01.000 idea what was going on in his 00:18:01.000 --> 00:18:04.000 head and he just said man you 00:18:04.000 --> 00:18:06.000 know that you can't mess with 00:18:06.000 --> 00:18:08.000 Mormons and their money and I 00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:10.000 was like you don't even know 00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:11.000 what happened and he's like 00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:13.000 just be in court on this day 00:18:13.000 --> 00:18:14.000 it'll be fine it's a dollar 00:18:14.000 --> 00:18:18.000 fifty not everything was okay 00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:19.000 not everything worked out 00:18:19.000 --> 00:18:22.000 fine in the end I had to pay 00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:24.000 restitution of a dollar fifty 00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:26.000 it was a hundred dollar court 00:18:26.000 --> 00:18:28.000 fine -- I had to serve ten 00:18:28.000 --> 00:18:29.000 hours of community service for 00:18:29.000 --> 00:18:34.000 the courts but BYU they 00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:36.000 made me have -- six months of 00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:38.000 counseling where I was forced 00:18:38.000 --> 00:18:40.000 to write in a journal every 00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.000 single day and talk about 00:18:42.000 --> 00:18:43.000 how what I had done wrong 00:18:43.000 --> 00:18:45.000 affected my spirit I had to 00:18:45.000 --> 00:18:47.000 admit blame in order to remain 00:18:47.000 --> 00:18:50.000 a student I also had to fulfill 00:18:50.000 --> 00:18:51.000 one hundred hours of community 00:18:51.000 --> 00:18:53.000 service on campus that 00:18:53.000 --> 00:18:56.000 included cleaning buildings 00:18:56.000 --> 00:18:57.000 it was kind of interesting 00:18:57.000 --> 00:18:60.000 taxidermy -- displays so I 00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:03.000 was like this is kind of alright 00:19:03.000 --> 00:19:05.000 I was also placed on academic 00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:07.000 probation and I lost part of 00:19:07.000 --> 00:19:09.000 my scholarship this incident 00:19:09.000 --> 00:19:11.000 has left a permanent mark 00:19:11.000 --> 00:19:13.000 on my public record it comes 00:19:13.000 --> 00:19:16.000 up now when I apply for jobs 00:19:17.000 --> 00:19:19.000 to be a foster parent every 00:19:19.000 --> 00:19:20.000 time I have to explain the 00:19:20.000 --> 00:19:23.000 situation justify my conviction 00:19:23.000 --> 00:19:25.000 relive the embarrassment of 00:19:25.000 --> 00:19:27.000 being a target as a person 00:19:27.000 --> 00:19:28.000 of color on a university 00:19:28.000 --> 00:19:34.000 campus it was horrific 00:19:34.000 --> 00:19:35.000 but I did have some really 00:19:35.000 --> 00:19:38.000 wonderful moments as well the 00:19:38.000 --> 00:19:39.000 most important understanding 00:19:39.000 --> 00:19:40.000 I gained from my university 00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:42.000 experience was when I wrote my 00:19:42.000 --> 00:19:44.000 senior thesis on Indian 00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:46.000 boarding schools it's when I 00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:48.000 started to fully comprehend 00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:49.000 that my relationship with 00:19:49.000 --> 00:19:51.000 Western education began with 00:19:51.000 --> 00:19:52.000 my Din' grandmother 00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:54.000 and my Omaha grandfather my 00:19:54.000 --> 00:19:55.000 research led me to interview 00:19:55.000 --> 00:19:57.000 my own family I gathered the 00:19:57.000 --> 00:19:60.000 matriarchs of my family and we 00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:02.000 sat around a traditional meal 00:20:02.000 --> 00:20:03.000 that I prepared was my way 00:20:03.000 --> 00:20:04.000 to sweeten the deal and get 00:20:04.000 --> 00:20:07.000 some stories out of them I 00:20:07.000 --> 00:20:08.000 explained to my grandmother 00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:09.000 and my aunties and my mother 00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:10.000 that I was writing a research 00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:12.000 paper on Navajo preparatory 00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:14.000 school a former Methodist 00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:16.000 mission school founded in the 00:20:16.000 --> 00:20:17.000 early days of colonization 00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:19.000 in the late eighteen hundreds 00:20:19.000 --> 00:20:20.000 where kids were kidnapped 00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:21.000 and forced to live with 00:20:21.000 --> 00:20:23.000 nuns it was they were then 00:20:23.000 --> 00:20:24.000 taken over by the bureau of 00:20:24.000 --> 00:20:26.000 Indian education in the early 00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:28.000 nineteen hundreds and most 00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:29.000 recently in the -- 00:20:32.000 --> 00:20:33.000 I further explained that the 00:20:33.000 --> 00:20:35.000 history of the school went 00:20:35.000 --> 00:20:37.000 from enslaving Navajo children 00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:40.000 to assimilation practices to 00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:42.000 trade schools to present day 00:20:42.000 --> 00:20:44.000 preparing Din' a youth in western 00:20:44.000 --> 00:20:46.000 education taught side by side 00:20:46.000 --> 00:20:48.000 with the Din' spirituality 00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:52.000 history science and literature 00:20:52.000 --> 00:20:53.000 I knew that my grandmother had 00:20:53.000 --> 00:20:54.000 taught there for many years 00:20:54.000 --> 00:20:55.000 I knew that my grandfather 00:20:55.000 --> 00:20:57.000 was a football coach and that 00:20:57.000 --> 00:20:58.000 my aunt went to high school 00:20:58.000 --> 00:20:60.000 there I was expecting a story 00:21:00.000 --> 00:21:02.000 of inspiration and instead 00:21:02.000 --> 00:21:05.000 I heard one of survivance my 00:21:05.000 --> 00:21:09.000 grandmother's eyes narrowed as 00:21:09.000 --> 00:21:12.000 I explained she peered at me 00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:13.000 with this chilling look and I'm 00:21:13.000 --> 00:21:15.000 sure everyone's had that from 00:21:15.000 --> 00:21:17.000 just like what are they about 00:21:17.000 --> 00:21:19.000 to say and she was completely 00:21:19.000 --> 00:21:23.000 silent for a very long time my 00:21:23.000 --> 00:21:25.000 aunt started to stand up and 00:21:25.000 --> 00:21:28.000 say oh -- like no we 00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:29.000 don't talk about this Grandma 00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:30.000 doesn't want to talk about this 00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:33.000 and as soon as she went to hold 00:21:33.000 --> 00:21:34.000 my grandmother's arm and lead 00:21:34.000 --> 00:21:36.000 her away and my grandma kinda 00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:40.000 swatted her and -- she took a 00:21:40.000 --> 00:21:42.000 deep sigh and she looked at me 00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:43.000 and she began telling me the 00:21:43.000 --> 00:21:45.000 story of how she first came to 00:21:45.000 --> 00:21:46.000 live at Navajo Mission when 00:21:46.000 --> 00:21:49.000 she was five years old she told 00:21:49.000 --> 00:21:52.000 me that she was a happy child 00:21:52.000 --> 00:21:53.000 she lived traditionally in a 00:21:53.000 --> 00:21:55.000 Hogan with her eleven siblings 00:21:55.000 --> 00:21:57.000 and her parents near Chaco Canyon 00:21:57.000 --> 00:21:60.000 she said that one day 00:22:00.000 --> 00:22:01.000 there was a dust cloud it was 00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:03.000 being made by horses and it was 00:22:03.000 --> 00:22:04.000 getting closer and closer and 00:22:04.000 --> 00:22:07.000 bigger than she had ever seen 00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:09.000 all of a sudden her mother told 00:22:09.000 --> 00:22:10.000 all the children to run 00:22:10.000 --> 00:22:13.000 hide she said she was scared and 00:22:13.000 --> 00:22:14.000 she didn't really know what was 00:22:14.000 --> 00:22:15.000 happening but she was running 00:22:15.000 --> 00:22:17.000 with her older sister and she 00:22:17.000 --> 00:22:19.000 tripped and fell and started 00:22:19.000 --> 00:22:21.000 to cry and in that moment of her 00:22:21.000 --> 00:22:23.000 crying and looking around and 00:22:23.000 --> 00:22:24.000 not knowing what was happening 00:22:24.000 --> 00:22:26.000 she was grabbed and she was 00:22:26.000 --> 00:22:31.000 put in a wagon by a soldier 00:22:31.000 --> 00:22:33.000 she was kicking and screaming 00:22:33.000 --> 00:22:34.000 she was begging for her 00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:36.000 mother she was begging for 00:22:36.000 --> 00:22:38.000 her sister and then she just 00:22:38.000 --> 00:22:42.000 stopped explaining and she said 00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:45.000 I was taken to Navajo Mission 00:22:45.000 --> 00:22:47.000 my grandparents were both 00:22:47.000 --> 00:22:49.000 forcibly kidnapped and sent 00:22:49.000 --> 00:22:50.000 to federal Indian boarding 00:22:50.000 --> 00:22:53.000 schools they grew up in post 00:22:53.000 --> 00:22:54.000 World War I and World War II 00:22:54.000 --> 00:22:55.000 generation where they're 00:22:55.000 --> 00:22:56.000 educated by the Bureau of 00:22:56.000 --> 00:22:58.000 Indian Education who's mantra 00:22:58.000 --> 00:22:60.000 was kill the Indian save the 00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:03.000 man they were taught domestic 00:23:03.000 --> 00:23:05.000 and labor skills in order to 00:23:05.000 --> 00:23:06.000 become part of the serving 00:23:06.000 --> 00:23:08.000 slash working class of America 00:23:08.000 --> 00:23:09.000 they were not allowed to speak 00:23:09.000 --> 00:23:11.000 their language practice their 00:23:11.000 --> 00:23:13.000 culture in any way or they 00:23:13.000 --> 00:23:15.000 would suffer physical abuse 00:23:15.000 --> 00:23:16.000 along with the emotional and 00:23:16.000 --> 00:23:17.000 mental abuse that they were 00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:20.000 currently suffering my mother 00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:23.000 was their eldest daughter -- 00:23:23.000 --> 00:23:24.000 and though at the time boarding 00:23:24.000 --> 00:23:28.000 schools were no longer required 00:23:28.000 --> 00:23:30.000 they still had them -- she 00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:31.000 was sent to live with a Mormon 00:23:31.000 --> 00:23:34.000 family in Utah and -- if 00:23:34.000 --> 00:23:35.000 any of you know a little bit 00:23:35.000 --> 00:23:38.000 about Mormons -- they're very 00:23:38.000 --> 00:23:41.000 interested in brown people they 00:23:41.000 --> 00:23:43.000 come into our communities and 00:23:43.000 --> 00:23:44.000 they try to convert us and they 00:23:44.000 --> 00:23:46.000 want us to join their church 00:23:46.000 --> 00:23:48.000 and so what they would do is 00:23:48.000 --> 00:23:49.000 they'd go onto our reservation 00:23:49.000 --> 00:23:51.000 and they would say to people 00:23:51.000 --> 00:23:52.000 you know they'll come and live 00:23:52.000 --> 00:23:54.000 with a family it's like a 00:23:54.000 --> 00:23:55.000 boarding school but they get 00:23:55.000 --> 00:23:56.000 to you know they have all the 00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:57.000 comforts of home and they get 00:23:57.000 --> 00:23:59.000 to come home in the summertime 00:23:59.000 --> 00:23:61.000 and in exchange we'll give you 00:24:01.000 --> 00:24:03.000 a tractor for your farm or we 00:24:03.000 --> 00:24:05.000 will help you out with fruit 00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:08.000 trees or you know it's very 00:24:08.000 --> 00:24:10.000 agricultural place people were 00:24:10.000 --> 00:24:13.000 pretty destitute and it seemed 00:24:13.000 --> 00:24:15.000 like a good deal to send your 00:24:15.000 --> 00:24:17.000 kids up to get a good education 00:24:17.000 --> 00:24:19.000 they were sent home at holidays 00:24:21.000 --> 00:24:22.000 summers and they were taken 00:24:22.000 --> 00:24:25.000 care of and my grandparents had 00:24:25.000 --> 00:24:28.000 eight kids -- my grandfather 00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:31.000 had jobs on and off as 00:24:31.000 --> 00:24:34.000 a trucker as a football coach 00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:35.000 kind of not being able to be 00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:37.000 steadily employed while my -- 00:24:37.000 --> 00:24:40.000 my grandmother was a teacher 00:24:40.000 --> 00:24:41.000 so they sent my mom up to 00:24:41.000 --> 00:24:46.000 live with Mormon families -- 00:24:46.000 --> 00:24:48.000 she was told to assimilate 00:24:48.000 --> 00:24:49.000 she was denied her language 00:24:49.000 --> 00:24:51.000 and culture my mother and 00:24:51.000 --> 00:24:53.000 grandmother have always emphasized 00:24:53.000 --> 00:24:56.000 education they always said it 00:24:56.000 --> 00:24:57.000 was the key to success climb 00:24:57.000 --> 00:24:60.000 the ladder to success that we 00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:02.000 must study hard be good be 00:25:02.000 --> 00:25:04.000 kind get a high school diploma 00:25:04.000 --> 00:25:06.000 go to university get a husband 00:25:06.000 --> 00:25:09.000 get a job have kids over 00:25:09.000 --> 00:25:12.000 and over and over my mom's a 00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:16.000 little disappointed with those 00:25:16.000 --> 00:25:17.000 my mom married young and had 00:25:17.000 --> 00:25:18.000 me by the time she was 23 00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:20.000 she taught me to read 00:25:20.000 --> 00:25:21.000 and write my name by the time I 00:25:21.000 --> 00:25:23.000 was four she wanted me to live 00:25:23.000 --> 00:25:25.000 my dreams and the ones that 00:25:25.000 --> 00:25:27.000 she didn't feel that she could 00:25:27.000 --> 00:25:28.000 she told me to study go to 00:25:28.000 --> 00:25:30.000 university travel and above all 00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:33.000 move away from the reservation 00:25:33.000 --> 00:25:34.000 this background of my family's 00:25:34.000 --> 00:25:36.000 relationship to education 00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:37.000 is important to know because 00:25:37.000 --> 00:25:38.000 there are layers in that where 00:25:38.000 --> 00:25:40.000 colonization has severed my 00:25:40.000 --> 00:25:42.000 ability to connect to my gender 00:25:42.000 --> 00:25:44.000 and my sexuality my coming out 00:25:44.000 --> 00:25:46.000 story's a little bit strange 00:25:46.000 --> 00:25:48.000 after graduating by tooth and nail 00:25:48.000 --> 00:25:50.000 literally I moved to 00:25:50.000 --> 00:25:52.000 Fengyuan Taiwan I wanted to live in a 00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:54.000 place that was so unfamiliar to 00:25:54.000 --> 00:25:56.000 me where I could just immerse 00:25:56.000 --> 00:25:58.000 myself in new experiences new 00:25:58.000 --> 00:25:61.000 language -- new food new ideas 00:26:01.000 --> 00:26:02.000 nobody knew me there were 00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:05.000 no expectations and I just 00:26:05.000 --> 00:26:07.000 wanted to have space to figure 00:26:07.000 --> 00:26:08.000 out who I was outside of my 00:26:08.000 --> 00:26:11.000 family outside of Christianity 00:26:11.000 --> 00:26:13.000 outside of the oppression that 00:26:13.000 --> 00:26:15.000 I experienced in university it 00:26:15.000 --> 00:26:17.000 wasn't long before I fell head 00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:18.000 over heels in love with a 00:26:18.000 --> 00:26:20.000 woman she was an indigenous 00:26:20.000 --> 00:26:23.000 Maori from Aotearoa or you 00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:25.000 might know it as New Zealand 00:26:25.000 --> 00:26:27.000 it was typical queer love 00:26:27.000 --> 00:26:32.000 U-haul -- it was totally magic I 00:26:32.000 --> 00:26:33.000 felt like I finally understood 00:26:33.000 --> 00:26:35.000 myself I wanted to tell 00:26:35.000 --> 00:26:36.000 everyone that I was in love 00:26:36.000 --> 00:26:37.000 and I found the person that 00:26:37.000 --> 00:26:39.000 I wanted to marry I thought 00:26:39.000 --> 00:26:40.000 my mom's going to totally be 00:26:40.000 --> 00:26:43.000 happy she was always pushing 00:26:43.000 --> 00:26:44.000 me to get married so why not 00:26:44.000 --> 00:26:46.000 right I'll give you grand kids 00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:49.000 way you know my auntie would 00:26:49.000 --> 00:26:50.000 always say the same and my 00:26:50.000 --> 00:26:52.000 cousin was like always a bit 00:26:52.000 --> 00:26:54.000 dubious and I think that's 00:26:54.000 --> 00:26:55.000 where she introduced the word 00:26:55.000 --> 00:26:57.000 asexual to me you don't like 00:26:57.000 --> 00:26:58.000 guys you think maybe you just 00:26:58.000 --> 00:26:61.000 like aren't sexual at all 00:27:01.000 --> 00:27:02.000 I was like what's that mean 00:27:02.000 --> 00:27:04.000 and that's where I learned 00:27:04.000 --> 00:27:05.000 asexual and I was like no I don't 00:27:05.000 --> 00:27:08.000 think that's quite it so as 00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:09.000 you can see I told my cousin 00:27:09.000 --> 00:27:12.000 first because she -- was much 00:27:12.000 --> 00:27:14.000 more open older kind of the 00:27:14.000 --> 00:27:15.000 cool cousin always getting 00:27:15.000 --> 00:27:17.000 in trouble and she's like 00:27:17.000 --> 00:27:18.000 you gotta tell grandma like 00:27:18.000 --> 00:27:20.000 actually grandma come here you 00:27:20.000 --> 00:27:22.000 know like on the phone and I 00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:23.000 was like yeah yeah put her on the 00:27:23.000 --> 00:27:25.000 phone I can't wait -- my 00:27:25.000 --> 00:27:27.000 grandma's wonderful -- I said grandma I 00:27:27.000 --> 00:27:29.000 have something to tell you I met 00:27:29.000 --> 00:27:31.000 someone in Taiwan they're 00:27:31.000 --> 00:27:33.000 wonderful kind smart I'm 00:27:33.000 --> 00:27:35.000 totally in love and she's like 00:27:35.000 --> 00:27:39.000 oh okay they? was like -- she picked 00:27:39.000 --> 00:27:41.000 up on that like right away 00:27:41.000 --> 00:27:42.000 she didn't hear the funny smart 00:27:42.000 --> 00:27:46.000 part said yeah Grandma their name's 00:27:46.000 --> 00:27:49.000 Nick and -- it's a woman 00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:52.000 I'm gay and there was a lot of 00:27:52.000 --> 00:27:55.000 silence as she does still a 00:27:55.000 --> 00:27:57.000 bit scared of that silence 00:27:57.000 --> 00:27:59.000 and she said oh yeah I know 00:27:59.000 --> 00:27:64.000 I was like excuse me what -- what do 00:28:04.000 --> 00:28:05.000 you mean like you understand 00:28:05.000 --> 00:28:07.000 it's going to be okay you're 00:28:07.000 --> 00:28:08.000 going to talk to mom like what 00:28:08.000 --> 00:28:09.000 do you mean and then she just 00:28:09.000 --> 00:28:11.000 went into this huge explanation 00:28:11.000 --> 00:28:12.000 and she's like yeah you've 00:28:12.000 --> 00:28:14.000 always been like that and I 00:28:14.000 --> 00:28:16.000 said like what she's like -- don't 00:28:16.000 --> 00:28:17.000 make a big deal out of it and 00:28:17.000 --> 00:28:20.000 then she started to explain our 00:28:20.000 --> 00:28:23.000 gendered system in our culture 00:28:23.000 --> 00:28:26.000 and she went into that she 00:28:26.000 --> 00:28:27.000 thought always thought that I 00:28:27.000 --> 00:28:31.000 was dilba and -- she's like 00:28:31.000 --> 00:28:32.000 you know I think you're dilba 00:28:32.000 --> 00:28:33.000 you always take care of the 00:28:33.000 --> 00:28:36.000 children you're always helping 00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:38.000 you're always solving problems in 00:28:38.000 --> 00:28:41.000 your family and you never like 00:28:41.000 --> 00:28:42.000 boys boys are always boring 00:28:42.000 --> 00:28:45.000 to you and I was like yeah I 00:28:45.000 --> 00:28:46.000 just thought I was focused on 00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:49.000 school I don't know -- and she 00:28:49.000 --> 00:28:51.000 said maybe if we lived a long 00:28:51.000 --> 00:28:53.000 time ago like our ancestors 00:28:53.000 --> 00:28:57.000 you'd be a medicine person 00:28:57.000 --> 00:28:58.000 and it kind of stuck 00:28:58.000 --> 00:28:59.000 with me you know like the 00:28:59.000 --> 00:28:63.000 responsibility of what your 00:29:03.000 --> 00:29:05.000 grandma thinks that maybe you 00:29:05.000 --> 00:29:07.000 might be pre colonization it's 00:29:07.000 --> 00:29:09.000 like this huge kind of -- what 00:29:09.000 --> 00:29:11.000 do you do with that and I sat 00:29:11.000 --> 00:29:13.000 with it for a lot of years 00:29:16.000 --> 00:29:17.000 role what am I escaping from 00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:18.000 I'm all the way on the other 00:29:18.000 --> 00:29:21.000 side of the globe -- what is 00:29:21.000 --> 00:29:23.000 my traditional role because 00:29:23.000 --> 00:29:26.000 I had one as my my tribe is 00:29:26.000 --> 00:29:29.000 matriarchal my grandmother 00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:32.000 the oldest daughter so that 00:29:32.000 --> 00:29:34.000 meant just within our matriarchal 00:29:34.000 --> 00:29:36.000 system that I was meant to take 00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:39.000 care of kids and -- take care 00:29:39.000 --> 00:29:40.000 of the well being of my family 00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:41.000 so I thought that was part of 00:29:41.000 --> 00:29:43.000 the matriarchal system and she 00:29:43.000 --> 00:29:44.000 said no it's part of you being 00:29:44.000 --> 00:29:47.000 dilba -- so that was my first 00:29:47.000 --> 00:29:49.000 understanding of the context 00:29:49.000 --> 00:29:51.000 of two-spirit and indigiqueer 00:29:51.000 --> 00:29:52.000 I didn't know that we 00:29:52.000 --> 00:29:54.000 have particular societal roles 00:29:54.000 --> 00:29:57.000 that vary from tribe to tribe 00:29:57.000 --> 00:29:58.000 and as I continue to grow 00:29:58.000 --> 00:29:59.000 and I continue to move in the 00:29:59.000 --> 00:29:61.000 world I've met other indigenous 00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:02.000 people who also identify as 00:30:02.000 --> 00:30:05.000 two-spirit two-spirit's a 00:30:05.000 --> 00:30:06.000 term that was coined in the 00:30:06.000 --> 00:30:07.000 early 1990s at 00:30:07.000 --> 00:30:09.000 the international gathering 00:30:09.000 --> 00:30:10.000 of indigenous queer community 00:30:10.000 --> 00:30:12.000 now known as the indigenous 00:30:12.000 --> 00:30:15.000 two-spirit gathering the reason 00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:16.000 this pan indigenous term was 00:30:16.000 --> 00:30:18.000 coined because many folks had 00:30:18.000 --> 00:30:20.000 heard stories of queer medicine 00:30:20.000 --> 00:30:21.000 people in their tribes but 00:30:21.000 --> 00:30:24.000 they all kind of some of them 00:30:24.000 --> 00:30:25.000 lost the word for what that 00:30:25.000 --> 00:30:27.000 is maybe some people knew what 00:30:27.000 --> 00:30:29.000 that was some people didn't 00:30:29.000 --> 00:30:30.000 and so there was a lot of talk 00:30:30.000 --> 00:30:32.000 about well what can we use that 00:30:32.000 --> 00:30:34.000 will identify all of us where 00:30:34.000 --> 00:30:36.000 we can use it in this space 00:30:36.000 --> 00:30:39.000 and every time that we gather 00:30:39.000 --> 00:30:40.000 so as people began to talk 00:30:40.000 --> 00:30:42.000 about that a few trans folks 00:30:42.000 --> 00:30:44.000 from the Plains tribes they said 00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:45.000 that their elders told them 00:30:45.000 --> 00:30:47.000 that queer people embody two 00:30:47.000 --> 00:30:50.000 spirits the male energy and 00:30:50.000 --> 00:30:52.000 the female energy that their 00:30:52.000 --> 00:30:53.000 traditional roles were sacred 00:30:53.000 --> 00:30:55.000 in the tribe and the embodiment 00:30:55.000 --> 00:30:57.000 of these binary energies was 00:30:57.000 --> 00:30:59.000 necessary to be peacemakers to 00:30:59.000 --> 00:30:61.000 be counselors to be medicine 00:31:01.000 --> 00:31:04.000 people to be caretakers of 00:31:04.000 --> 00:31:07.000 orphaned children -- to be 00:31:07.000 --> 00:31:08.000 defenders and warriors of your 00:31:08.000 --> 00:31:11.000 tribe that collective of queer 00:31:11.000 --> 00:31:14.000 folk coined the term two-spirit 00:31:14.000 --> 00:31:16.000 recently queer indigenous 00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:17.000 academics have realized 00:31:17.000 --> 00:31:18.000 that many in of our community 00:31:18.000 --> 00:31:20.000 have done a lot of work to 00:31:20.000 --> 00:31:21.000 reclaim words that describe 00:31:21.000 --> 00:31:23.000 our various gender and sexual 00:31:23.000 --> 00:31:27.000 identities in our languages 00:31:27.000 --> 00:31:28.000 the Two-Spirit Society has 00:31:28.000 --> 00:31:29.000 been collecting these terms for 00:31:29.000 --> 00:31:31.000 the last thirty years and now 00:31:31.000 --> 00:31:34.000 there are over fifty reclaimed 00:31:34.000 --> 00:31:36.000 and in that reclamation our 00:31:36.000 --> 00:31:37.000 community has discovered that 00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:39.000 many tribes don't prescribe 00:31:39.000 --> 00:31:41.000 to gender binary some tribes 00:31:41.000 --> 00:31:44.000 have seven genders some have five 00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:47.000 like mine but gender identities 00:31:47.000 --> 00:31:49.000 are completely separate from 00:31:49.000 --> 00:31:51.000 sexual identity and that both 00:31:51.000 --> 00:31:53.000 of those are on a spectrum 00:31:53.000 --> 00:31:54.000 out of that work and learn 00:31:54.000 --> 00:31:56.000 knowledge a new pan Indian 00:31:56.000 --> 00:31:58.000 term has come about called 00:31:58.000 --> 00:31:60.000 Indigiqueer I still find 00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:03.000 myself going back and forth 00:32:03.000 --> 00:32:05.000 between what is my identity 00:32:05.000 --> 00:32:07.000 what really connects with me 00:32:07.000 --> 00:32:08.000 what feels good and I think 00:32:08.000 --> 00:32:10.000 that's something to really 00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:12.000 examine and think about as an 00:32:12.000 --> 00:32:15.000 individual as any individual 00:32:15.000 --> 00:32:16.000 what is my identity it's gonna 00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:17.000 constantly grow it's gonna 00:32:17.000 --> 00:32:19.000 constantly evolve and you 00:32:19.000 --> 00:32:22.000 can identify however you feel 00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:24.000 inside and it will change over 00:32:24.000 --> 00:32:27.000 your lifetime the consistent 00:32:27.000 --> 00:32:29.000 work done to discover and the 00:32:29.000 --> 00:32:31.000 reclamation of identity within 00:32:31.000 --> 00:32:32.000 the indigenous community is 00:32:32.000 --> 00:32:34.000 one that is mirrored by western 00:32:34.000 --> 00:32:37.000 society as well how wonderful 00:32:37.000 --> 00:32:39.000 that communities and societies 00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:40.000 are shedding the confines 00:32:40.000 --> 00:32:43.000 that colonization has held how 00:32:43.000 --> 00:32:44.000 beautiful that various tribal 00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:46.000 nations are able to reclaim 00:32:46.000 --> 00:32:47.000 and then share our traditional 00:32:47.000 --> 00:32:50.000 knowledge in this context let 00:32:50.000 --> 00:32:52.000 me be clear western society 00:32:52.000 --> 00:32:55.000 suppressed this knowledge they 00:32:55.000 --> 00:32:57.000 killed indigenous queer people 00:32:57.000 --> 00:32:58.000 and when they came across them 00:32:58.000 --> 00:32:62.000 in tribes -- then Christianity 00:33:02.000 --> 00:33:04.000 oppressed our elders in societies 00:33:04.000 --> 00:33:05.000 and ordered us to condemn 00:33:05.000 --> 00:33:06.000 these members of our communities 00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:09.000 once revered as spiritual 00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:11.000 leaders and the fiercest of 00:33:11.000 --> 00:33:13.000 warriors as caretakers of 00:33:13.000 --> 00:33:15.000 orphaned children as medicine 00:33:15.000 --> 00:33:17.000 people two-spirit people were 00:33:17.000 --> 00:33:19.000 powerful and colonizers knew 00:33:19.000 --> 00:33:20.000 they needed to suppress in 00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:23.000 order to conquer with this 00:33:23.000 --> 00:33:24.000 information is where we can 00:33:24.000 --> 00:33:25.000 start to come together as a 00:33:25.000 --> 00:33:28.000 queer community that while 00:33:28.000 --> 00:33:29.000 you may listen to my story 00:33:29.000 --> 00:33:31.000 and feel a loss for me there's 00:33:31.000 --> 00:33:33.000 also a loss for you buried 00:33:33.000 --> 00:33:35.000 deeper in all of our ancestral 00:33:35.000 --> 00:33:36.000 history are people that did 00:33:36.000 --> 00:33:39.000 not adhere to binaries that 00:33:39.000 --> 00:33:40.000 doesn't mean the answers to 00:33:40.000 --> 00:33:43.000 appropriate native concepts but 00:33:43.000 --> 00:33:45.000 to understand that our history 00:33:45.000 --> 00:33:46.000 is to come to terms with your 00:33:46.000 --> 00:33:48.000 own for we have a story and a 00:33:48.000 --> 00:33:50.000 connection on Turtle Island 00:33:50.000 --> 00:33:53.000 that's unique to us and if your 00:33:53.000 --> 00:33:55.000 work if you choose to do it 00:33:55.000 --> 00:33:57.000 is to grieve what you've lost 00:33:57.000 --> 00:33:60.000 because it requires a grieving 00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:01.000 and what you have been born 00:34:01.000 --> 00:34:04.000 into as settlers on Turtle 00:34:04.000 --> 00:34:06.000 Island or people who have been 00:34:06.000 --> 00:34:09.000 forcibly moved to Turtle Island 00:34:09.000 --> 00:34:11.000 when we do this work together 00:34:11.000 --> 00:34:13.000 we can come together as equals 00:34:13.000 --> 00:34:15.000 we can respect and love one 00:34:15.000 --> 00:34:16.000 another and stand together in 00:34:16.000 --> 00:34:18.000 our commonalities and fight for 00:34:18.000 --> 00:34:20.000 each other where we experience 00:34:20.000 --> 00:34:23.000 common and different oppression 00:34:23.000 --> 00:34:25.000 I want to tell you a few 00:34:25.000 --> 00:34:27.000 stories about some indigenous 00:34:27.000 --> 00:34:32.000 queer -- elders -- there was 00:34:32.000 --> 00:34:34.000 a Zuni trans woman named 00:34:34.000 --> 00:34:37.000 We'wha and she served her tribal 00:34:37.000 --> 00:34:39.000 delegation in 1886 00:34:39.000 --> 00:34:42.000 and went to Washington DC 00:34:42.000 --> 00:34:43.000 so she was there with about 00:34:43.000 --> 00:34:46.000 twelve Zuni people and was the 00:34:46.000 --> 00:34:48.000 leader because she was the the 00:34:48.000 --> 00:34:51.000 spiritual leader of that nation 00:34:52.000 --> 00:34:54.000 negotiate a treaty and -- 00:34:54.000 --> 00:34:56.000 and peace for her tribe and 00:34:56.000 --> 00:34:59.000 was very successful at it -- 00:34:59.000 --> 00:34:60.000 until it was discovered that 00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:02.000 she was trans and she was 00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:03.000 nearly killed and run out of 00:35:03.000 --> 00:35:05.000 the halls of Congress literally 00:35:05.000 --> 00:35:07.000 running down the halls to escape 00:35:07.000 --> 00:35:11.000 for her life Lowzen an Apache 00:35:11.000 --> 00:35:14.000 warrior she could ride this 00:35:14.000 --> 00:35:16.000 is a quote she could ride and 00:35:16.000 --> 00:35:18.000 shoot and fight like a man 00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:19.000 she was brilliant in military 00:35:19.000 --> 00:35:22.000 strategy she fought alongside 00:35:22.000 --> 00:35:24.000 Geronimo in Apache wars she 00:35:24.000 --> 00:35:26.000 was a two-spirit woman who had 00:35:26.000 --> 00:35:28.000 multiple wives and a community 00:35:28.000 --> 00:35:30.000 to defend she was powerful 00:35:30.000 --> 00:35:32.000 spiritually and she led Geronimo's 00:35:32.000 --> 00:35:34.000 war party to safety 00:35:34.000 --> 00:35:36.000 Geronimo I don't know if you 00:35:36.000 --> 00:35:39.000 know the story -- never was 00:35:39.000 --> 00:35:40.000 was never conquered the Apache 00:35:40.000 --> 00:35:42.000 people were never conquered they 00:35:42.000 --> 00:35:44.000 in fact went to the soldiers 00:35:44.000 --> 00:35:46.000 and surrendered but the reason 00:35:46.000 --> 00:35:49.000 why they were constantly able 00:35:49.000 --> 00:35:50.000 to evade more than just knowing 00:35:50.000 --> 00:35:52.000 the land is that Lozen was 00:35:52.000 --> 00:35:55.000 very powerful Lozen would 00:35:55.000 --> 00:35:59.000 raise her hands to a direction 00:35:59.000 --> 00:35:61.000 all the way around and where 00:36:01.000 --> 00:36:03.000 she felt heat they would go the 00:36:03.000 --> 00:36:04.000 opposite because the heat was 00:36:04.000 --> 00:36:06.000 where the soldiers were so they 00:36:06.000 --> 00:36:08.000 were able to evade the army's 00:36:08.000 --> 00:36:11.000 for several several years and 00:36:11.000 --> 00:36:14.000 not only until -- there was 00:36:14.000 --> 00:36:16.000 a campaign to slash and burn 00:36:16.000 --> 00:36:18.000 all of our fields and they 00:36:18.000 --> 00:36:20.000 were starving is when they 00:36:20.000 --> 00:36:24.000 surrendered -- have anyone 00:36:24.000 --> 00:36:27.000 heard of Crow Dog Soldiers so 00:36:27.000 --> 00:36:30.000 Crow Dog Soldiers are there's 00:36:30.000 --> 00:36:32.000 these incredible stories of the 00:36:32.000 --> 00:36:34.000 Crow people the Crow Nation is 00:36:34.000 --> 00:36:36.000 near in between like northern 00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:38.000 Cheyenne and the Sioux tribe 00:36:38.000 --> 00:36:39.000 in the Plains and they're on the 00:36:39.000 --> 00:36:40.000 Missouri River as well and they're 00:36:40.000 --> 00:36:42.000 very fierce and the Crow Dog 00:36:42.000 --> 00:36:44.000 Soldiers I always thought were 00:36:44.000 --> 00:36:46.000 like kind of a wack story 00:36:46.000 --> 00:36:49.000 because it was this one warrior 00:36:49.000 --> 00:36:50.000 where they would have like a 00:36:50.000 --> 00:36:53.000 long ribbon like a robe that 00:36:53.000 --> 00:36:55.000 was stuck to the ground and 00:36:55.000 --> 00:36:57.000 there they would fight stuck 00:36:57.000 --> 00:36:59.000 to that one spot to distract 00:36:59.000 --> 00:36:62.000 invading armies so as the US 00:37:02.000 --> 00:37:03.000 military came they would go and 00:37:03.000 --> 00:37:04.000 attack that one person because 00:37:04.000 --> 00:37:06.000 they were they were acting 00:37:06.000 --> 00:37:07.000 crazy they were the crazy dog 00:37:07.000 --> 00:37:09.000 soldiers and so they would like 00:37:09.000 --> 00:37:11.000 run and jump and you know and 00:37:11.000 --> 00:37:13.000 they would be tied to one spot 00:37:13.000 --> 00:37:14.000 so the army's would be like 00:37:14.000 --> 00:37:16.000 this is very strange and go to 00:37:16.000 --> 00:37:18.000 it and then they would go to 00:37:18.000 --> 00:37:20.000 want to kill this person while 00:37:20.000 --> 00:37:21.000 the rest of the tribe would 00:37:21.000 --> 00:37:26.000 be able to escape -- last year 00:37:26.000 --> 00:37:28.000 I took a training with -- the 00:37:28.000 --> 00:37:30.000 Montana Two-Spirit Society and 00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:32.000 they have incredible elders 00:37:32.000 --> 00:37:35.000 that -- tell stories and I was 00:37:35.000 --> 00:37:36.000 in a room of indigenous people 00:37:36.000 --> 00:37:38.000 and this Crow elder stood and 00:37:38.000 --> 00:37:40.000 he was part of the training 00:37:40.000 --> 00:37:42.000 he's not a queer person and 00:37:42.000 --> 00:37:44.000 so people were kind of like 00:37:45.000 --> 00:37:47.000 and he stood and told us the 00:37:47.000 --> 00:37:49.000 story of you know we've all 00:37:49.000 --> 00:37:50.000 heard of crazy dog soldiers and 00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:54.000 everybody yeah and he said -- 00:37:54.000 --> 00:37:56.000 the dog soldiers were always 00:37:56.000 --> 00:37:59.000 our queer warriors because they 00:37:59.000 --> 00:37:63.000 faced the most -- hardship in 00:38:03.000 --> 00:38:06.000 their lives navigating the two 00:38:06.000 --> 00:38:08.000 spirits and really defending 00:38:08.000 --> 00:38:11.000 their tribe and so they came 00:38:11.000 --> 00:38:13.000 their nation and their society 00:38:13.000 --> 00:38:14.000 as queer people came up with 00:38:14.000 --> 00:38:16.000 that on their own that was 00:38:16.000 --> 00:38:19.000 their military strategy which I 00:38:19.000 --> 00:38:21.000 just find like so incredibly brave 00:38:21.000 --> 00:38:25.000 Sharice Davids of the Ho-Chunk Nation 00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:26.000 she was elected 00:38:26.000 --> 00:38:28.000 to US Congress for the state of 00:38:28.000 --> 00:38:30.000 Kansas she's currently serving 00:38:30.000 --> 00:38:32.000 and walking the -- the halls 00:38:32.000 --> 00:38:33.000 of Congress that We'wha 00:38:33.000 --> 00:38:35.000 was run out of a hundred and 00:38:35.000 --> 00:38:38.000 thirty years ago Candy Brings Plenty 00:38:38.000 --> 00:38:40.000 she's of the Standing 00:38:40.000 --> 00:38:42.000 Rock Sioux Nation she founded 00:38:42.000 --> 00:38:45.000 the Portland Two-Spirit Society 00:38:48.000 --> 00:38:50.000 folks went to Standing Rock 00:38:50.000 --> 00:38:52.000 does people know about Standing 00:38:52.000 --> 00:38:53.000 Rock we all went want to Standing 00:38:53.000 --> 00:38:55.000 Rock and Candy showed up and 00:38:55.000 --> 00:38:57.000 she's from that nation and she 00:38:57.000 --> 00:38:60.000 went to -- the elders to the 00:39:00.000 --> 00:39:02.000 council and she said -- the 00:39:02.000 --> 00:39:05.000 two-spirit people want a place 00:39:05.000 --> 00:39:06.000 want a camp we want to have 00:39:06.000 --> 00:39:08.000 a camp together and there was 00:39:08.000 --> 00:39:09.000 a discussion among that and if 00:39:09.000 --> 00:39:11.000 anyone knows about the Sioux 00:39:11.000 --> 00:39:13.000 nation is that the face of the 00:39:13.000 --> 00:39:15.000 elders of the leaders are men 00:39:15.000 --> 00:39:17.000 but the the people that make 00:39:17.000 --> 00:39:19.000 the decision are the women so 00:39:19.000 --> 00:39:21.000 they have a line of the elders 00:39:21.000 --> 00:39:22.000 and then they have the women 00:39:22.000 --> 00:39:23.000 behind them because they're the 00:39:23.000 --> 00:39:25.000 ones that make the decision and 00:39:25.000 --> 00:39:28.000 the decisions come forward so 00:39:28.000 --> 00:39:29.000 there was an elder there that 00:39:29.000 --> 00:39:31.000 felt really agitated and you 00:39:31.000 --> 00:39:33.000 know he was kind of like 00:39:33.000 --> 00:39:36.000 huffing and -- what is this like 00:39:36.000 --> 00:39:38.000 we're only we're what nation 00:39:38.000 --> 00:39:39.000 are you from you know we have 00:39:39.000 --> 00:39:41.000 the Navajo Nation coming here 00:39:41.000 --> 00:39:43.000 we have the Omaha nation there 00:39:43.000 --> 00:39:44.000 were so many different nations 00:39:44.000 --> 00:39:45.000 represented and Candy said we 00:39:45.000 --> 00:39:47.000 want to put our flag on that 00:39:47.000 --> 00:39:50.000 on that -- road because in the 00:39:50.000 --> 00:39:51.000 road into Standing Rock stood 00:39:51.000 --> 00:39:54.000 flags of all the nations and he 00:39:54.000 --> 00:39:56.000 said what nation are you from 00:39:56.000 --> 00:39:58.000 and she said it just came to 00:39:58.000 --> 00:39:59.000 her and she stood and she said 00:39:59.000 --> 00:39:63.000 we're the two-spirit nation and 00:40:03.000 --> 00:40:06.000 the elder behind him she had 00:40:08.000 --> 00:40:10.000 the ground and she said let it 00:40:10.000 --> 00:40:13.000 be so and he went silent and 00:40:13.000 --> 00:40:15.000 the Two-Spirit Nation became 00:40:15.000 --> 00:40:17.000 re-integrated into the Standing 00:40:17.000 --> 00:40:18.000 Rock Sioux tribe which had 00:40:18.000 --> 00:40:21.000 been lost for over a hundred 00:40:21.000 --> 00:40:24.000 years she is very powerful 00:40:24.000 --> 00:40:26.000 she's currently fighting 00:40:26.000 --> 00:40:28.000 and working with -- the ACLU 00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:30.000 fighting against legislation 00:40:30.000 --> 00:40:32.000 in South Dakota that was just 00:40:32.000 --> 00:40:35.000 passed -- to ban HRT 00:40:35.000 --> 00:40:37.000 and therapy for trans children 00:40:39.000 --> 00:40:41.000 Blackfeet he's a Portlander 00:40:42.000 --> 00:40:43.000 representative house district 00:40:43.000 --> 00:40:45.000 fifty from Gresham he works 00:40:45.000 --> 00:40:47.000 at NAYA Family Center with me 00:40:50.000 --> 00:40:53.000 old very focused kid when I 00:40:53.000 --> 00:40:54.000 first met him and I used to 00:40:54.000 --> 00:40:56.000 drive him to Pow Wows and 00:40:56.000 --> 00:40:57.000 he would always say how he 00:40:57.000 --> 00:40:58.000 wants to be president and he 00:40:58.000 --> 00:40:60.000 wore suits at like fourteen 00:41:00.000 --> 00:41:02.000 and now he's running for 00:41:02.000 --> 00:41:04.000 State Representative and it 00:41:04.000 --> 00:41:05.000 just makes total sense you 00:41:05.000 --> 00:41:08.000 know he really is this strong 00:41:08.000 --> 00:41:10.000 indigenous queer person that 00:41:10.000 --> 00:41:12.000 knows where his values are 00:41:12.000 --> 00:41:13.000 and is ready to lead for our 00:41:13.000 --> 00:41:16.000 community so these stories of 00:41:16.000 --> 00:41:18.000 two-spirit people past and present 00:41:18.000 --> 00:41:19.000 give me strength and give me 00:41:19.000 --> 00:41:22.000 hope they're part of my story 00:41:22.000 --> 00:41:24.000 and they're part of my identity 00:41:24.000 --> 00:41:27.000 they provide models inspiration 00:41:27.000 --> 00:41:28.000 for what it looks like to be 00:41:28.000 --> 00:41:31.000 indigenous and queer and where 00:41:31.000 --> 00:41:33.000 am I now it brings us to 00:41:33.000 --> 00:41:35.000 present day bridging my past 00:41:35.000 --> 00:41:37.000 and working for my future my 00:41:37.000 --> 00:41:39.000 little self if I thought about 00:41:39.000 --> 00:41:41.000 myself as a five year old would 00:41:41.000 --> 00:41:44.000 think I'm ballin' speaking on a 00:41:44.000 --> 00:41:47.000 stage at a university well podium 00:41:47.000 --> 00:41:49.000 talking about myself driving a 00:41:51.000 --> 00:41:55.000 in a job I love feeling valued 00:41:55.000 --> 00:41:57.000 I would say I'm resilient and 00:41:57.000 --> 00:41:58.000 in this knowledge I draw 00:41:58.000 --> 00:41:60.000 power and strength knowing 00:42:00.000 --> 00:42:02.000 that the same survivance of 00:42:02.000 --> 00:42:03.000 my people who witnessed the 00:42:03.000 --> 00:42:05.000 apocalypse of their world runs 00:42:05.000 --> 00:42:09.000 in me I continue their legacy 00:42:09.000 --> 00:42:10.000 I'm living in the past the 00:42:10.000 --> 00:42:13.000 present and the future as an 00:42:13.000 --> 00:42:14.000 indigenous queer person with 00:42:14.000 --> 00:42:16.000 a western education who's 00:42:16.000 --> 00:42:17.000 looking back to my history and 00:42:17.000 --> 00:42:20.000 traditions to support me these 00:42:20.000 --> 00:42:21.000 traditions are what hold me 00:42:21.000 --> 00:42:23.000 to the land to my place and 00:42:23.000 --> 00:42:25.000 to my responsibility these are 00:42:25.000 --> 00:42:27.000 the traditions I'm investing 00:42:27.000 --> 00:42:29.000 in in my work for the future 00:42:29.000 --> 00:42:32.000 and for future generations I 00:42:32.000 --> 00:42:33.000 work at the Native American 00:42:33.000 --> 00:42:34.000 Youth and Family Center in 00:42:34.000 --> 00:42:36.000 Portland it's an organization 00:42:36.000 --> 00:42:38.000 of education and support for 00:42:38.000 --> 00:42:40.000 the Native American and Alaskan 00:42:40.000 --> 00:42:41.000 Native community where both 00:42:41.000 --> 00:42:43.000 the western and traditional 00:42:43.000 --> 00:42:46.000 indigenous co exist and they 00:42:46.000 --> 00:42:48.000 inform one another we're 00:42:48.000 --> 00:42:50.000 introducing ourselves our 00:42:50.000 --> 00:42:53.000 tribes our pronouns our full 00:42:53.000 --> 00:42:56.000 identity and it's a space that 00:42:56.000 --> 00:42:58.000 wholly supports that it gives 00:42:58.000 --> 00:42:60.000 us context in the sacredness 00:43:00.000 --> 00:43:01.000 of our being when we're able 00:43:01.000 --> 00:43:04.000 to express those things we're 00:43:04.000 --> 00:43:06.000 now fostering a generation 00:43:06.000 --> 00:43:07.000 of proud resilient smart 00:43:07.000 --> 00:43:09.000 two-spirit kids as well they have 00:43:09.000 --> 00:43:11.000 access to traditional thought 00:43:11.000 --> 00:43:13.000 and education in order to keep 00:43:13.000 --> 00:43:15.000 them and sorry in order to 00:43:15.000 --> 00:43:17.000 help them come into balance 00:43:17.000 --> 00:43:18.000 as they navigate western 00:43:18.000 --> 00:43:20.000 society and find their strength 00:43:20.000 --> 00:43:22.000 and identity in it as an 00:43:22.000 --> 00:43:24.000 indigenous queer person I am 00:43:24.000 --> 00:43:27.000 finally fully out as a queer 00:43:27.000 --> 00:43:30.000 as non-binary as living in a 00:43:30.000 --> 00:43:32.000 decolonized relationship structure 00:43:32.000 --> 00:43:33.000 those pieces of 00:43:33.000 --> 00:43:35.000 decolonizing my gender and 00:43:35.000 --> 00:43:37.000 sexuality are being reclaimed 00:43:37.000 --> 00:43:38.000 and the next piece for our 00:43:38.000 --> 00:43:41.000 community is discovering and 00:43:41.000 --> 00:43:42.000 reclaiming our relationship 00:43:42.000 --> 00:43:44.000 structures being able to fully 00:43:44.000 --> 00:43:47.000 live these and openly the point 00:43:47.000 --> 00:43:50.000 is the queer community has more 00:43:50.000 --> 00:43:53.000 ways to grow and we need to be 00:43:53.000 --> 00:43:54.000 leading our society out of the 00:43:54.000 --> 00:43:55.000 limits of what has been laid 00:43:55.000 --> 00:43:58.000 upon us as an indigenous queer 00:43:58.000 --> 00:43:59.000 person I'm proud of my culture's 00:43:59.000 --> 00:43:61.000 traditions and defining my 00:44:01.000 --> 00:44:03.000 role of the community as sacred 00:44:03.000 --> 00:44:05.000 I don't just use the words 00:44:05.000 --> 00:44:08.000 two-spirit or indigiqueer I 00:44:08.000 --> 00:44:09.000 also take on the responsibility 00:44:09.000 --> 00:44:10.000 of what the role in my 00:44:10.000 --> 00:44:12.000 community is like I said I sat 00:44:12.000 --> 00:44:14.000 with those words my grandmother 00:44:14.000 --> 00:44:16.000 used and told me over twenty 00:44:16.000 --> 00:44:18.000 years ago currently my partner 00:44:18.000 --> 00:44:20.000 and I are foster parents to 00:44:20.000 --> 00:44:22.000 three indigenous siblings I'm 00:44:22.000 --> 00:44:23.000 fulfilling what my grandmother 00:44:23.000 --> 00:44:25.000 told me was my traditional 00:44:25.000 --> 00:44:27.000 role I'm a nurturing parent 00:44:27.000 --> 00:44:30.000 to kids in my home and in my 00:44:30.000 --> 00:44:33.000 job I'm a protector fiercely 00:44:33.000 --> 00:44:35.000 advocating for two-spirit youth 00:44:35.000 --> 00:44:37.000 for foster youth and for 00:44:37.000 --> 00:44:38.000 kids in the community being 00:44:38.000 --> 00:44:39.000 squeezed out of the public 00:44:39.000 --> 00:44:42.000 school system I'm a mediator 00:44:42.000 --> 00:44:44.000 I teach restorative justice to 00:44:44.000 --> 00:44:46.000 our youth when in conflict I'm 00:44:46.000 --> 00:44:48.000 an educator training my staff 00:44:48.000 --> 00:44:50.000 and teachers in the public 00:44:50.000 --> 00:44:51.000 school system of indigenous 00:44:51.000 --> 00:44:53.000 history and curriculum through 00:44:53.000 --> 00:44:55.000 work with Senate bill thirteen 00:44:55.000 --> 00:44:58.000 tribal history shared history 00:44:58.000 --> 00:44:59.000 with the identity I was born 00:44:59.000 --> 00:44:62.000 into as a Din' Omaha Pawnee 00:45:02.000 --> 00:45:04.000 indigiqueer human I wouldn't 00:45:04.000 --> 00:45:05.000 have been to I wouldn't have 00:45:05.000 --> 00:45:08.000 been led to do this work 00:45:08.000 --> 00:45:10.000 thanks for inviting me 00:45:10.000 --> 00:45:20.000 applause 00:45:20.000 --> 00:45:21.000 okay can we give her another 00:45:21.000 --> 00:45:27.000 round of applause 'cause that was so cool 00:45:27.000 --> 00:45:29.000 okay as a thank you to Mick 00:45:29.000 --> 00:45:30.000 for coming and sharing their 00:45:30.000 --> 00:45:32.000 story and being so open with 00:45:32.000 --> 00:45:34.000 all of us here tonight -- 00:45:34.000 --> 00:45:35.000 we would like to present you 00:45:35.000 --> 00:45:37.000 with a gift -- this is a 00:45:37.000 --> 00:45:39.000 blanket from the Western Oregon 00:45:39.000 --> 00:45:41.000 University family -- as an 00:45:41.000 --> 00:45:42.000 acknowledgement of friendship 00:45:42.000 --> 00:45:44.000 gratitude and the utmost 00:45:44.000 --> 00:45:47.000 respect -- I also want to thank 00:45:47.000 --> 00:45:48.000 our Vice President for Student 00:45:48.000 --> 00:45:50.000 Affairs Gary Dukes as well as 00:45:50.000 --> 00:45:51.000 our Dean of Students Tina Fuchs 00:45:51.000 --> 00:45:53.000 for joining us this evening I 00:45:53.000 --> 00:45:54.000 would also like to thank WOU 00:45:54.000 --> 00:45:57.000 Catering for the delicious meal 00:45:57.000 --> 00:45:58.000 that I didn't eat yet but I 00:45:58.000 --> 00:45:62.000 will -- and on behalf of MSU 00:46:02.000 --> 00:46:04.000 all of you for coming tonight 00:46:04.000 --> 00:46:05.000 and spending your evening 00:46:05.000 --> 00:46:07.000 with us -- to celebrate this 00:46:07.000 --> 00:46:09.000 year's Out and Pride event 00:46:09.000 --> 00:46:11.000 in closing I wanted to just 00:46:11.000 --> 00:46:13.000 read a quote that I saw from 00:46:13.000 --> 00:46:15.000 Standing Rock -- the two-spirit 00:46:15.000 --> 00:46:17.000 Nation -- for all of you to leave 00:46:17.000 --> 00:46:20.000 with this evening it reads we 00:46:20.000 --> 00:46:21.000 feel and express differently 00:46:21.000 --> 00:46:23.000 because we were blessed with 00:46:23.000 --> 00:46:25.000 two spirits we are male and 00:46:25.000 --> 00:46:26.000 female we are gay bi and 00:46:26.000 --> 00:46:29.000 transgender it's a gift and a 00:46:29.000 --> 00:46:31.000 sacred station thank you again 00:46:31.000 --> 00:46:34.000 and have a wonderful rest of your evening 00:46:34.000 --> 00:46:38.000 applause