WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 music. 00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:08.000 This event celebrates and explores various cultures and ethnic backgrounds. 00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 That are within the LGBTQ community 00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 And recognizes their challenges as well as celebrating their achievements and successes. 00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 Poison Waters first appeared in Portland in 1988. 00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:28.000 So, I can't do math. Since then Poison has worked and volunteered with countless nonprofit groups in our community and has twice been invited to speak at the Portland City Hall. 00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 And now we welcome Poison Waters. 00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:40.000 Poison Waters: Oh my gosh, so first of all, thank you for coming out and thank you, I didn't even know that, where'd he go? 00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 Hey Leo, remember me? I guess Leo and I had a date about 5 years ago. 00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:50.000 And this same event, not really a date, but I spoke, was it five years ago? 00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:57.000 So it's super duper fun and I am so glad to be back 00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:64.000 in Monmouth and as far as I recall, yeah it's far from Portland, are any of you from Portland? 00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 Oh, can I get a ride back? No I'm totally just kidding. 00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 No, I'm here with my partner Jefferson, he was so sweet to leave work early, 00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:17.000 yeah he wanted to leave work early, he didn't even care. So, we came here and it was wonderful 00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 and it was pouring down rainy day time, 00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:25.000 and then we came here and sunny and nice and then it was pitch black so I feel like we've been driving for four days. 00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 So I'm sorry if I'm a little wrinkled or disheveled but 00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:37.000 I'm so excited to get to be in a room that is so multicultural in a lot of the places that I'm invited to speak and preform, 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:40.000 in Portland, it's not the case. 00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:47.000 As you can imagine. So I get to do a lot of really great things, with really, I call them 00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:53.000 rich white people, and I don't mean it in a mean way, but I mean that's a lot of what's going in the world these days, so to be in this room with so many 00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:60.000 wonderful colors, first of all, it's usually I'm the raisin in the rice patch okay, when I go to these events 00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 the one black chick at the opera. 00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:08.000 I'm so glad to be here, my mother is Native American and Mexican, 00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:15.000 and she's from Santa Fe, New Mexico and my father is black, African American from Santa Monica, California and so I'm 00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 one of those who came here from somewhere else. And I came here in 1979, 00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:25.000 And when I moved to Portland, now this is what's going to sound really bizarre, 00:02:25.000 --> 00:02:28.000 Portland is the blackest city I've lived in. 00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:31.000 Ouch, I know right? 00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:38.000 So then I thought "wow" when I first went to this school and I was like "oh my gosh, there's so many black people" 00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:51.000 And then now that I've travelled many many many places I realize that, but that's how sheltered I was 00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 culturally, coming to Portland in 1979 with my family, 00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:60.000 So I'll just give you a little bit of background, this is what's going on in my head, so I say that I'm the middle child, 00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:04.000 but there are four of us, so do the math. 00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:12.000 So my mother and father divorced when I was very very young so I didn't have that influence of the black side of my family. 00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:16.000 And so I was with the latino and native american side 00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 of my family, which I loved of course, but my mother quickly married a caucasian man. 00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:26.000 And his family, which is great too, nothing bad. So it's my sister and I and then my sister is one year older than I. 00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:28.000 So you know, she's the girl. 00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:32.000 The girls are always the girls. Then there's me. 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:36.000 And then there's my two little brothers that my mom had with my step father. 00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:40.000 So I felt like there were two lighter boys that were 00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:44.000 the sons of the man who raised me, and then my sister. Well the sister's always the sister. 00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 A girl right? And then there was me, I felt like I was in the middle. So people always say "how are you in the middle?" 00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:54.000 That's where I come from, from back then. So I was always like huh, and now look at me, so anyway. 00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:57.000 So that's where that was, so we're growing up 00:03:57.000 --> 00:03:62.000 My mother's family was quite large, we've lost many of them now. 00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:11.000 So we kind of had that cultural kind of landscape, that's what we were doing, obviously such a rebel though 00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:16.000 we lived in New Mexico for a short amount of time, went to a bicultural school, 00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:23.000 bilingual school, I wouldn't learn Spanish I was like, "I'm not learning Spanish," Everybody in my family speaks Spanish except me. 00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:28.000 I'm like the one, expect I can always tell when they're talking about me. 00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:33.000 And so my mother and her sister and my grandmother used to speak Spanish, 00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:37.000 They would speak it on the phone, and they would speak it around us and I'm just like totally the odd man out. 00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:42.000 And that a lot of that I probably placed on myself but you know when you're growing up you kinda think a lot of things, so 00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:45.000 I knew I was different, my mother, of course mother's always know. 00:04:45.000 --> 00:04:52.000 So my mother always knew I was different and looking back at my childhood I knew that she knew and just by the things that 00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:56.000 the way that she protected me in many situations, 00:04:56.000 --> 00:04:60.000 sometimes in a way that I didn't feel like I was being protected, I was like "what's your problem?" 00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:04.000 But you know, she was like "No, I know what you don't know yet." 00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:14.000 just kind of had this relationship, myself and my family, where I was 00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:22.000 odd, for many reasons, and then we just went along with it though, you know we just didn't talk about it or whatnot. 00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:27.000 And then after I graduated high school, my mom and my sister were like 00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:42.000 I always thought that I was the only one, and I always thought that I was unique, sometimes I feel like I'm a Dr. Seuss character 00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:45.000 because I'm black and I'm Mexican, and I'm 00:05:45.000 --> 00:05:51.000 Native American and I'm the middle child of 4 children and I didn't have a father, 00:05:51.000 --> 00:05:61.000 and I like boys. So I was like "what planet did I come from and when are the people coming back to suck me back into the ship because this is so weird." 00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:07.000 So we just went through life and so when my mom and sister told me that, I was like "Oh my god, I am" 00:06:07.000 --> 00:06:14.000 And I didn't really know what that meant, and I just kind of thought when you don't have it, okay first of all, let's back up. 00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:23.000 I'm old. Okay, compared to you guys. I'm not old, I'm only 47, but compared to you I could be y'alls father. 00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:26.000 And maybe some of y'alls grandfather if he was getting busy early, 00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:31.000 It happens, I watch daytime TV. And so, I 00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:36.000 laughter. 00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:44.000 So I kind of, back then, like nowadays when I talk to so many young people and I just love that there's so much 00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:52.000 there's so many resources out there for LGBTQ young folks, 00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:60.000 there's so much out there in Portland now for children of color even in grade school age 00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:08.000 just to help guide their way through life as a child of color of as a child in the LGBTQ community or 00:07:08.000 --> 00:07:14.000 both, and that is so fantastic. But let me you remind you, none of that was there. 00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:19.000 Okay, I didn't even know what that meant. There wasn't a word for it. 00:07:19.000 --> 00:07:21.000 There was no RuPaul's Drag Race, 00:07:21.000 --> 00:07:30.000 there wasn't even cable TV. And we did not have all of this stuff, and so now it's just everywhere and it's so mainstream and it's so fantastic, 00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:35.000 and that's kind of fast forwarding to today one of the best things about my life I feel is that I get to 00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:43.000 be at Darcelle's is the longest showing Drag in the whole United Sates, Darcelle's 85, he's 00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:50.000 way older than me, and so we do a show there, it's a drag show and it's been there for like 00:07:56.000 --> 00:07:60.000 The one thing in my story is that it was before I was born. 00:08:00.000 --> 00:08:08.000 And so we cater to really anybody who walks in the door. The majority of people who come into our club 00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:13.000 are out of town people, straight people, 00:08:13.000 --> 00:08:19.000 like bachelorettes and travelers and birthdays it's kind of like a Farrell's but with better entertainment. 00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:25.000 And so we, do you guys even know what Farrell's is? You're such kids. Oh I mean young adults, I apologize. 00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:32.000 I feel like we just get to like be who we are in front of so many people, 00:08:32.000 --> 00:08:36.000 whereas, where I was saying from, I just wanted to be invisible. 00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:41.000 You know, I just felt like I was invisible, even if sometimes I wanted to, but sometimes like "somebody pay attention to me" 00:08:41.000 --> 00:08:44.000 Then when they did, I kind of got the wrong attention. 00:08:44.000 --> 00:08:47.000 You know what I mean, like uh huh. 00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:53.000 I am just so pleased that nowadays young folks don't have to go through what we did when we were so. 00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:60.000 Back to 1986, I graduated high school, I didn't even know that I was gay, I knew I was kind of feeling weird, 00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:05.000 in someway, there were no words for it, well thank god I found this place. 00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:10.000 I went to this college and I met these people from Gresham high school, I didn't even know where that was but 00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:12.000 I know, right? 00:09:12.000 --> 00:09:17.000 How embarrassing. So I met these people and they said, "Oh let's go to the city" 00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:20.000 Well I thought they meant Downtown Portland. 00:09:20.000 --> 00:09:24.000 And I grew up in Park Rose, which is kind of like East County ish so there's not a lot, oh yeah go Broncos. 00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:26.000 And so, 00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:33.000 Oh yeah, I went to the old school, not the one that got knocked down and rebuilt nicer, so yeah 00:09:33.000 --> 00:09:36.000 Yeah so we're not really "Go Bronco's" 00:09:36.000 --> 00:09:40.000 Okay, because I'm like in the onion fields across the street, so anyway, 00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:49.000 they said "Let's go to the city" and I was like "Okay, we're going downtown" I didn't even know what that was, and the city was a nightclub, 00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:56.000 and it was so fancy as far as I'm concerned, I felt like I was in New York or Berlin or something, and having not been to either of those places, I didn't even know what I thought I knew, right? 00:09:56.000 --> 00:09:60.000 So we went there and it's dark and it's a low ceiling, 00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:05.000 and smells the most fabulous, grossest combination 00:10:05.000 --> 00:10:13.000 and the people there, it's the 80's we were preppy back then, 00:10:13.000 --> 00:10:19.000 But these people had like spiked mohawks and multicolors. 00:10:19.000 --> 00:10:26.000 And leathers and studs and that was new wave, punk rock era that you guys probably read about in history books, 00:10:26.000 --> 00:10:33.000 and the most exciting thing was that there was boys dancing with boys and girls dancing with girls and I saw two boys kiss and I swear I almost fainted. 00:10:33.000 --> 00:10:36.000 But I was so intrigued, I had to stay awake. 00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:42.000 And so it was super duper cool, and so that's where I was like "Oh my gosh," so when people say where are you from, 00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:49.000 you know, where did you come from or where did you find out who you were, where did you come into your own self? 00:10:49.000 --> 00:10:52.000 I always say, now this where we get a little science. 00:10:52.000 --> 00:10:57.000 I say, that I feel like you're from wherever you went through puberty. 00:10:57.000 --> 00:10:60.000 Does that sound weird? Because that's where you really become the person that you are today. 00:11:00.000 --> 00:11:05.000 Finding the city nightclub, and finding the queer young youth, 00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:09.000 situation that I didn't even know existed, I literally I couldn't have imagined it. 00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:15.000 Even if I saw it in a movie, I wouldn't have believed what I had experienced, what I was seeing, what I was in, it was totally like 00:11:15.000 --> 00:11:21.000 Alice in Wonderland, or Dorothy when she gets into Oz and everything is colorized, you know what I mean? That's what I really saw. 00:11:21.000 --> 00:11:27.000 People of all different colors, and all different shapes and sizes and fabulousness and they were just being them and I'm like, 00:11:28.000 --> 00:11:33.000 This is the spaceship I thought I'm being sucked back in finally, 00:11:33.000 --> 00:11:36.000 Finally 17 and it hadn't happened, so. 00:11:36.000 --> 00:11:43.000 I think finding your people, so to speak, is so important whether it's your blood relatives, or your ancestry and your history or just the people that 00:11:43.000 --> 00:11:51.000 share your same ideals, and your same values and your same thoughts, and another thing, I don't know it just popped into my head, 00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:60.000 I've grown more from bonding with people that we share those things, 00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:04.000 but that we challenge each other, if you don't argue with your friends, 00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:11.000 get different friends. You know what I mean? I think it's all fun to have someone like, no. 00:12:11.000 --> 00:12:16.000 And you have to have friends that tell you "girl, green?" But don't tell me, because this is my color. 00:12:16.000 --> 00:12:24.000 But I mean, we all need that okay and that's just one of my pearls of wisdom I'm going to throw out there for free. 00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:28.000 So, Let's see, where was I, okay so 00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:36.000 the first time somebody said that I, the world "lifestyle" doesn't bother me, when people say "Oh you chose a lifestyle" then that bothers me, 00:12:36.000 --> 00:12:44.000 But if you say "oh you're living this lifestyle" nowadays, yeah that's the style of my life, I mean my life is 00:12:44.000 --> 00:12:53.000 you know, me, 24/7. Well the first time someone said drag was my lifestyle, I was like "No it's not, that's crazy" 00:12:53.000 --> 00:12:59.000 Because I'd put this on, like a costume, and then I'd take it off, it's like my uniform at McDonalds. 00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:04.000 But it smells better at the end of the night, that's not what I meant. 00:13:04.000 --> 00:13:06.000 But whatever. 00:13:06.000 --> 00:13:14.000 I have always identified as a man, and worked a day job as a man. 00:13:14.000 --> 00:13:21.000 And then I put on my drag and do what I do in drag and then I take it off and go to bed as a man. So to me, 00:13:21.000 --> 00:13:28.000 when somebody said drag was my lifestyle, I was just kind of offended, not that there's anything wrong with somebody 00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:32.000 lives in drag, and now don't get me started on all of the terminology of who 00:13:32.000 --> 00:13:39.000 there are so many different things, oh I meant to do my disclaimer at the beginning. Can you rewind the tape and we can start all over, no I'm just kidding, 00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:47.000 Everything that I'm talking about, I can only speak for me and I'm sure a lot of folks in this room, 00:13:47.000 --> 00:13:53.000 the black girls, you say something and everybody's like thinking you're speaking for all of the black girls, or you know, if you're 00:13:53.000 --> 00:13:57.000 asian guy, you're speaking for all the asian guys, I don't know if that happens, that happens to me. 00:13:57.000 --> 00:13:63.000 Anything I say, people are like "Oh so all the drag queen" Like no, I said me. Or you know, the latino community 00:14:03.000 --> 00:14:10.000 And the American Indian community, everything I speak and as I was growing up I'd found that a lot because all of a sudden 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:18.000 I was a loudmouth, that I was making a blanket statement for everyone and I'm not, I'm only making statements for myself and everything I say 00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:20.000 I stand behind. 00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:24.000 Unless we delete the tape and say I never said it. Okay, so, 00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:28.000 for me, I'm a drag queen. 00:14:28.000 --> 00:14:32.000 I mean some people say impersonator, they can be whatever they want, for me I'm just a drag queen. 00:14:32.000 --> 00:14:38.000 And I say just because it's me, I put it on, I take it off. It's just a drag queen it's a part of who I am. But 00:14:38.000 --> 00:14:44.000 I for some reason, as a teenager I was offended by someone saying a drag queen lifestyle, but now, 00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:52.000 all these years later, I mean sometimes I'm in drag more often then I'm not, because it's so busy and thank goodness people want to 00:14:52.000 --> 00:14:57.000 experience Poison Waters and what I can bring to any event. 00:14:57.000 --> 00:14:60.000 So now, I embrace it, and so if somebody says "well what is your lifestyle?" 00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:09.000 Well I'm a gay man, I am black man, I'm a Mexican man, I'm an American Indian man, I'm all of these things, 00:15:09.000 --> 00:15:14.000 and I'm also a drag queen on top of it all and to me that's the cherry on the cake, nowadays I'm like yes. 00:15:14.000 --> 00:15:26.000 Put it all together and I think I was so concerned with just people one thing, like it was easier to be like, I'm black. Like you know the little box on forms? Holy guacamole. 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:36.000 I'm not on that form, I'm just not. And they always say you can only check one, why do I only have to check one? Because I'd be like 00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:40.000 Mhm, mhm, mhm, well it's Wednesday mhm. 00:15:40.000 --> 00:15:51.000 So I was just brought up that way, and so now to just be like "I am all of the boxes, I'm the whole, I can be whatever" 00:15:51.000 --> 00:15:58.000 And I just love that about me, and I just love that I get to see so many young people now also embrace that 00:15:58.000 --> 00:15:64.000 you know, 30 years earlier than I did in their life, and so 00:16:04.000 --> 00:16:12.000 I just love that part. Now that I get to do whatever I want and say whatever I want and be whoever I want 00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:22.000 it's so Opera, it's so euh. It's like the authentic me, I'm living my best life, so she says, but she didn't give me a car. 00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:28.000 The happiest, the most fulfilled I am in my life 00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:35.000 is where I am now, and I remember being your guy's age and going " I want it, I want it, I want this, I want that, you know." 00:16:35.000 --> 00:16:43.000 I wanted prosperity and I wanted a relationship and I wanted this living situation and this this this, and you know I was like 18, 00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:51.000 and I really thought "Oh my gosh if I don't get it next year, I'm just going to die, it's going to be the worst life I've ever had" and it just goes by so quickly and like now 00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:58.000 I'm the closest I've ever been to total fulfillment that I've ever had in my whole life, 00:16:58.000 --> 00:16:63.000 and if somebody were to have told me when I was your age, "Oh when you're 47, it's all going to click" 00:17:04.000 --> 00:17:10.000 Oh my gosh, shut the front door. That just seemed like so far away but it's not and all the things and I go back 00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:14.000 and all the things I've gotten to do, and all of the things that challenge me and the people that challenge me, 00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:22.000 That's what brought me to where I am right today to be this fulfilled and 00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:24.000 happy. 00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:28.000 Everyday is the new day, everyday its like it's happening now. 00:17:28.000 --> 00:17:34.000 This is it. And I remember wasting so many years and planning and when when when while meanwhile the whole life 00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:36.000 was passing me by. What do they say, 00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:44.000 I myself, who am globe trotting constantly, let me tell you, 00:17:44.000 --> 00:17:48.000 it's something that I have to remember "Oh my gosh calm down and just look, oh yeah" 00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:55.000 These are important things that you need to pay attention to. 00:17:55.000 --> 00:17:59.000 Oh wait are you all registered to vote, okay, don't get me started. 00:17:59.000 --> 00:17:66.000 There's something that happened last year at Portland's Pride and so, 00:18:06.000 --> 00:18:12.000 obviously you guys have heard the term homophobia, and most of you have probably heard the term transphobia, 00:18:12.000 --> 00:18:19.000 So, being a drag queen, and being a gay man, I don't identify as trans. 00:18:19.000 --> 00:18:22.000 And so there are times when people confuse the two. 00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:31.000 Whether they're within our community believe it or not, but most often outside, and so I think when you're educating someone kindly and politely like "No, I'm a drag queen" 00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:43.000 And then people think that's me being transphobic, which I don't believe it to be. 00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:48.000 If you're not identifying with something and you're letting somebody know that you're not, 00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:52.000 to me, that doesn't make it transphobic. That would be like 00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:59.000 saying you're gay if you're not gay, so the transgender community is I feel like 00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:10.000 people in and out of our community I feel like there's this perceived notion that the drag community and the trans community don't get along 00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:16.000 and I don't understand that. We're two separate 00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:20.000 groups within the same community and we're not trying to be 00:19:20.000 --> 00:19:28.000 what the other is, and so I don't understand why people are frustrated that 00:19:28.000 --> 00:19:34.000 I wont identify as trans, or I do know why a trans woman would be offended is somebody called her a drag queen. 00:19:34.000 --> 00:19:36.000 Because she's not a drag queen. 00:19:36.000 --> 00:19:44.000 There's a difference right. So this last Pride in Portland there was a big sink because there was a trans woman and a drag queen and they wanted them to be together 00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:48.000 and people didn't understand why there should be a separation and so 00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:57.000 I always like to softly point out because I'm not trans and I can't speak from the trans community so I like to softly point out that there are difference. 00:19:57.000 --> 00:19:63.000 In all things, it's better to ask a polite question than just make a general assumption. 00:20:03.000 --> 00:20:07.000 I have to just tell you one other thing, because people always say to Jefferson and I, 00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:17.000 Well just because you can, doesn't mean you should. And I say that all the time and trust me I'm in big trouble with all of my 00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:22.000 same sex partnered friends, but I'm also invited to 00:20:22.000 --> 00:20:31.000 MC same sex receptions all the time and I love it and they know that's my stance and I kind of 00:20:32.000 --> 00:20:39.000 you know, a lot of the drag queens are running out to get ordained to be ministers like "oh my god we're going to make a fortune, everybody get married now, let's book all these weddings now" 00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:47.000 That doesn't make sense to me, like all of sudden they say you can wear blue shoes everybody's going to run out and buy blue shoes, well no, 00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:51.000 you just wait until blue shoes are right for you, I dunno, that's what I'm saying. 00:20:51.000 --> 00:20:57.000 So anybody that is considering a relationship, whether you're gay, straight or all in between, 00:20:57.000 --> 00:20:64.000 don't get married just because you can. Because then I'm going to have MC your divorce party, 00:21:04.000 --> 00:21:07.000 And I charge a lot, I totally will, I totally will. 00:21:07.000 --> 00:21:14.000 So I'm kind of all over the place cause that's just how I roll, because I don't really do a script, and I kind of just go all over the place. 00:21:14.000 --> 00:21:27.000 I'm so excited to be a black man in a dress okay? And in the 70's and 80's that would have been a terrible place to be for me. 00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:32.000 But now it's an exciting place to be and I encourage any of you that want to be a black man in a dress, 00:21:32.000 --> 00:21:36.000 Well if you're black. 00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:40.000 Because then that brings up a whole other problem, no I'm just kidding I'm not even going to go into that. 00:21:40.000 --> 00:21:48.000 So that's where I am right now, and I started out not in a good place and I'm ending in a fabulous place and I'm just so happy 00:21:48.000 --> 00:21:52.000 that I get to meet people, and hear people's stories. 00:21:52.000 --> 00:21:64.000 music.